Twelve is definitely NOT the new Eleven

Rating: 2/10 (22 December 2004)

First of all, let me make it clear that I really liked Ocean's Eleven. I liked the cleverness of the script, most of the characters involved (even Julia Roberts), and the crafty workmanship of the movie that left me with "aha" and "wow" at the end.
So having said that, I really didn't like Ocean's Twelve at all. I got tired about half an hour into it, and I would have fallen asleep had I been sitting on my couch instead of a theater seat in the last 30 minutes. The plot was way too convoluted and unfocused that even after all of the explanation (quite a lengthy one at that), I was still confused. When later I thought about it more and got around to understanding it, I couldn't help but question why certain things had to be done in a certain way, and no answer I could come up with was good. That's when I became angry for paying $8 to watch the damn movie.
Some movies you can predict the twist in the middle of it and still enjoy (as many movies do this). Some movies you have no idea what's going on, and still have no clue far afterwards but nevertheless enjoy (see Mulhallond Drive). This is a movie that does none of that, and in the end I really didn't care whether Ocean's Twelve became Ocean's Zero (and remember, I like these characters). And what I couldn't stand throughout the movie is the smugness that saturates the writing and direction, as if the cast was constantly reminding itself and letting the audience know that they are cool. It's like hearing an inside joke that you have no idea what it means, and then when you are let in on it, it's not really funny at all.