The Difference Between The Entertaining Illusion and The Illusion !

Rating: 1/10 (23 January 2011)

This had more vitality and stars than the first. But ended up being lower than it.
First off, the script. Oh that script. It suffers from too many characters, exhausting twists, and incredible silliness. It even whines about a daughter and her lost father, a loving wife and her thief husband who she forgives lately for no apparent reasons, while there is no characterization or whatsoever form the start! The irony of having (Pitt, Zeta-Jones, Clooney, Roberts, Garcia, Damon, Willis, Mac, Cheadle, Coltrane, Gould, and Finney) with this script kills me. Most of them have no necessity at all. For instance; what Gould did do else talking about defecation?, what Cheadle did do else moving around the minim replica?, what Mac did do else being in jail for all the time?!!, and so on and on. Aside from a certain sense of bore, it created also such a frustration that made us really feel "HOW WASTED!".
It leaves you with numerous questions; who was that wealthy American, the faceless one in the flashback on the yacht, that wanted the gang to be stopped? Why Finney, as the greatest thief, agreed with his pupil (Nightfox), then double-crossed him later? If Ocean's 11 robbed the egg earlier, why they went to pull off the 3D trick with the fake Julia Roberts plan? (brilliant way to mark them ALL TOGETHER in the police files!), and if that was done for going to jail with Clooney, so Demon's mom gets them out, then why bother yourself using that strange plan B?, just send that mom to get him out! And if Ocean's 11 went to rob (Nightfox)'s palace while they don't know about his hidden cameras, then they're stupid.. exactly like this movie! Obviously, that was for the sake of twists that assume being "smart" or "smarter than you dear viewer", while they're wholly not. As you see, it moves from the relaxing "don't think", to the shameful "brainless", to the insulting "you're brainless"!
I hate the movie makers' confidence that they can make dumb errors and lazy points and get away with it in the name of coolness, post-modernism, whatever. Can anybody tell me why Mac's character was in jail for? Or what did Zeta-Jones's character say to Coltrane's in the interrogation room to break him?
Speaking about that nasty confidence, the dialogue is SO PAINFUL. They thought when very unfunny lines are being said by cool stars then they would be funny. Well, that's the definition of ridiculousness, which this movie has MUCH of it. Review some with me: "If you're gonna ask if you can ask me a question, give me time to respond. Unless you're asking rhetorically, in which case the answer is obvious - yes.", "Doesn't this guy believe in fresh air? / He opens the second floor window every now and then. / What does that mean? / It means he opens the second floor window every now and then." And the ugliest "..That guy doing Potsie is unbelievable". I didn't have that dryness out of the worst sitcoms!
Further, thinking that making fun of fake Julia / real Julia, and useless Bruce Willis, led to terrible sequence. While not finishing the jokes is always bad, the movie so foolishly savors it to the max (the lost catchphrase of the stand up comedian, the talk about Willis's movie scene..). Saw the moment in the bar with Clooney and Pitt laughing a long, so detestable, laugh at something that we don't know! Did they think that when these 2 Hollywood stars do it, then we must laugh as well??!!
I knew later that George Nolfi, one of the main writers here, wrote a never made John Woo movie named "Honor Among Thieves", then Warner Bros. asked him to *adjust* it for the Ocean's characters. According to what I watched, he made a chock-full messy mix. Remember fine, that guy is the same one who wrote (Timeline - 2003), (The Sentinel - 2006), and (The Bourne Ultimatum - 2007); namely some of the most confident shoddy scripts I have ever seen!
To burn it more, let's talk about the direction. Clooney said in a TV interview that the first Ocean movie was a salute to the 1970s heist movies (Huh?!), and the second one is a salute to the 1960s ones (Double the Huh?!!). Is it because the second was shot in Europe? Actually Steven Soderbergh was more 70s in the second, knowing the weird angles, shooting outdoors, the hand held camera, etc. at any cost, he tried to make the Hollywood stuff yet with different feel, using a flavor from the realistic cinema. However, the outcome is shockingly tasteless. We didn't enjoy the stars through image or basically a good script. And it isn't an enjoyment on the level of being artistic either. I only enjoyed the laser beams dance, with the eastern music of Thé à la Menthe, performed by La Cautionit, as the one thing that could be re-watched.
(Ocean's Twelve) shows a new type of awfulness where endless colors are thrown in sterile vacuum. It alleges being intelligent, funny, cool, and light while it's dumb, unfunny, cold, and heavy. I believe in entertainment it's supposed to make a dazzling illusion, not being full of illusion yourself. This movie is like its (Nightfox); so rich yet with tons of vanity, thinks the job is done, while it's not.
It was produced with $110,000,000, to gain $125,531,634? I think it deserved less!
P.S: When Willis as Willis met Roberts as fake Roberts playing the real Roberts (dizzy!), then asked her about Danny; you have to think was that for breaking the fourth wall (as if Willis ran into the filming of an "Ocean" sequel, and asked about Clooney's character), or was Willis a party in the scheme already?? The thing is "Danny" is Roberts's husband's name in the movie, and - after little reading - I knew that it's also the nickname of Roberts's husband, Daniel Moder, out of the movie! Anyhow, it was the top of this movie's dullness, and one of the most confusing moments in movie history!