attack of the heist movies

Rating: 4/10 (16 March 2004)

Let me confess something straight away - I hate heist movies. As my Dad is fond of pointing out, in real life people hate thieves - yet Hollywood insists on turning them into heroes, time and again! I wonder why. Could it be that Hollywood loves underdogs? That can't be the case in "Ocean's Eleven"; somehow I can't see Clooney, Pitt, Damon and co. ever qualifying as "underdogs." They're rich pretty boys who want to steal some cash so they can become richer and prettier. Yuck.
Here's a few disturbing elements to chew on: we've got a full range of stereotypes on display here, from the Funny Asian Guy (defined exclusively by his physical ability) to the Angry Cockney Guy (defined exclusively by his accent and his anger!). Julia Roberts, the only woman on display - and boy, is she ON DISPLAY - is defined exclusively through her relationships with men. What, can't she have a subplot that doesn't involve romance? No, of course not - she's a female character in boys' own rubbish.

Still, somewhere in the depths of my cynical being, I am mildly entertained by these gaudy proceedings; some deeply-buried part of me enjoys watching the white collar crime antics of these People magazine celebrities. But for brainless entertainment, I'd still take the likes of Godzilla over this crowd any day.