Avoid at all costs: no cigar

Rating: 1/10 (19 December 2010)

A genuine stinker of a film. Hugh Grant acts an 80s wash-up singer who's faced with writing a song for the biggest artist in the world. In his crayzee plant-watering girl, he finds a lyricist. And as the back of the DVD reads, "sweet music develops, in more than one way". Having watched this film, I felt as though Bernard Herrmann's epic brass for "Cape Fear" was upon me. Lingering death. I'll try to explain this: death of intelligence, bad words paired together trying to collate as to make out jokes (the only exception being Grant's words on how candy sprayed onto a bunch of old people made him recall Altamont), no romance, no good songs (apart from Moroder's "The Neverending Story" and a "nice try" to Bloodshot & Avant who somehow agreed to do a song for this clownboat) and the general feel that all atmosphere left this film a long time ago. Avoid.