If you like Lifetime Movies and Danielle Steele...

Rating: 1/10 (23 October 2002)

Most directors have a gimmick (or a 'hook') and David Lynch in the past ("The Elephant Man", "Twin Peaks", "Blue Velvet" etc...) always had the ability to manipulate an audiences emotions - to take them down a road less travelled and freak everybody out...But with "Mulholland Drive" he fails with his own gimmick - he can't make it work, instead he gives us his drug induced fantasies.
He introduces two female characters one blonde, one brunette ala "Diabolique" who team up to solve the mystery of the brunette's identity. (She was in a car accident and has amnesia)...I know, I know this already sounds like a plot for a Lifetime movie - but it gets worse. Soon, they're best friends, daring each other to dealve further and further into danger. I won't give away the end - but it's fairly predictable if you know Lynch's work. Anyway, the end really isn't the point - it's this long meandering path, like Mulholland Drive itself twisting and turning - - and very, very boring.
The acting is horrible, the two leads compete for camera time, while Lynch plays dress up - - showing them off in Hitchcockian wardrobe to impress those few people who've never seen "Vertigo" or "North by Northwest". They both give wide eyes, coy looks and constant sexual intensity - even while looking at a dead body... sometimes they cry - but only in the "hottest" way, snuggling up close to each other while one tear falls down a cheek....so trashy.
The third lead is a "director" (apparently Lynch himself) who basically has a bad day and goes home to find his wife sleeping with the pool man. Wow! That's original, huh?! (sarcastic). Again, the movie borrows from the untapped cache of Danielle Steele and Lifetime movies of the week. Gold! What a diamond mine! (sarcastic).
In conclusion, I can't believe I watched the whole thing. I was waiting for something Blue (as is his trademark) - - and finally came the Blue Key and Blue Box...uh...so what? Oh ya, there was also the girl with the Blue Hair at the "Silencio Club" The second I saw her I knew she would say "Silencio" and she finally did...yay.
The only people who will like this film are men who want to watch a little girl-on-girl-action with their wife beside them so snuggle up to them and say "SEE?!!! It's art!".