Dull, plodding, pedantic

Rating: 3/10 (24 November 2001)

This film makes no sense. I could stop my review there, but seeing as this film is currently taking up space in the top 250 that would be better used by Weekend at Bernie's, let me repeat--there is absolutely no linear narrative thread running through the course of this motion picture. David Lynch is too busy filming things out of focus to bother with thinking up a "plot." I suppose that would be fine in something interesting happened while we were being taken on this non-linear trip, but aside from a couple of lesbian scenes featuring two very good looking women, nothing remotely interesting happens in well over two hours. Despite its excessively long running length, the film shows signs of major editing--for example, Robert Forster gets star billing and shows up in one scene for about 30 seconds.
The acting isn't bad, but since it all takes place in an emotional void it is impossible to tell what the actors are supposed to be conveying most of the time. Is the director laid-back? too frighten for words? Really Cool? Stoned? Planning a counter-move? Who can tell if this is good acting or not?
I would love to know if anyone out there who rated this film higher than a five could tell me the plot. I sort of doubt it.