Gimme a Break!

Rating: 4/10 (14 March 2002)

OK, so I went to this movie on the recommendations of some trusted friends, as well as the raving reviews on this wonderful website. I must have missed SOMETHING, because this movie looked like hot garbage TWICE warmed over. The thing is, I thought the acting was great. This is the first time that I really, really liked a Kidman character. Admittedly, she was amazing as Satine.
Unfortunately, when I left the movie my eyes were sore, my brain was confused and my constitution was generally appalled. All of the gawdy color, fast-moving cuts, close-ups of grotesque faces...who could deal? And besides that, Luhrmann had the audacity to make this movie 2.5 hours long! Are you kidding? I could've told this story in 45 minutes with hand puppets.
This movie goes into the same garbage can as "Speed 2: Cruise Control," "The Haunting" (no, I will never see another Jan de Bont movie as long as I live), and that tragedy on celluloid "The Talented Mr. Ripley." Sheesh, I should've seen "Pootie Tang."
4/10