Garbage

Rating: 1/10 (16 September 2017)

Mother! is a disaster, a car wreck and a movie abortion that lived. There are no plot points that get resolved - only plot warts and chancres that will forever make you regret that one night you had with Aronofsky.
Remember how you watched years of Lost and toiled over the minutia seeking clues and resolutions that never came? Yup. Except at least there the ride had it's merits. This, however, is a journey down a cinematic hole akin to a journey through a broken car wash... over and over. You hear the gears clanking. You hear the water flowing... somewhere.
And the whole time you think, "This makes no sense... but the reveal, the twist, the wrap-up will be epic!" Nope. Zero.
And if anyone sugar-coats this or tries to say, "well, you just didn't 'get it,' either kick them in the nuts or boob punch them for failing the "is-that-dookie-or-chocolate-cake" test. This is *clearly* dookie. There is NO cake. There is NO PRETENDING that this is cake. The trailer pretended this is cake. The trailer lied.
This is not a horror. This is 2 hours of "just how uncomfortable can we make Jennifer Lawrence appear?" The truth is bit like letting your 3-year-old into the kitchen to cook. You will find a bowl of cereal and ketchup, milk and raw fish, flour and dry Cool Aid powder and a hundred other ingredients - that when used separately and in any other setting might make a meal. But here they just make a mess. A disgusting, boring, unresolved ass fest.