Pitbull Sucks!

Rating: 6/10 (2 June 2012)

Written Markus Robinson, Edited by Nicole I. Ashland
I waited ten years for this?! This third installment of the beloved (yet seemingly forgotten) "Men in Black" franchise reunites not only Will Smith (The Pursuit of Happiness)and Tommy Lee Jones (No Country for Old Men), but also director Barry Sonnenfeld and writer Lowell Cunningham; in a film that leaves much to be desired when held side by side with the original. In fact, for the first forty-five minutes, "Men in Black 3" is almost unwatchable, containing relatively no laughs. So, is Will Smith to blame simply because, unlike any film in the series before, "Men in Black 3" is pretty much the Will Smith show? Well, the answer to that question is a resounding no. The disappointments here actually stem from not poor script structure, but an abundance of shockingly dull one liners. The sad fact is that Will Smith is given absolutely nothing funny to say for the first half of the film. And, of course, it doesn't help that during the final credits audiences are subjected to that God awful Pitbull song. It isn't until the arrival of Josh Brolin (No Country for Old Men), nearly half way through, that things with "Men in Black 3" become even the slightest bit entertaining. And, as you can probably tell by my rating, this film does get better as the second hour hits its stride. But if what I say is true and only half the movie is worth watching, then shouldn't logic dictate that my admission price be cut in half? The Plot: This third installment follows Agent K (Jones) and (now veteran) Agent J (Smith) as they go about their Men in Black business; you know, protecting the earth from the scum of the universe and zapping people in the eyes with that memory eraser thing. But little do they know that an evil alien, with the very fitting name of Boris The Animal, has just escaped from intergalactic prison, and has the elimination of Agent K on his mind. But he doesn't plan on killing K in the conventional alien way (no probing). Boris plans to go back in time and kill young Agent K. So, when Agent J wakes up one day to find his partner missing, "to find the truth, he has to do back in time" (damn you Pitbull!).
There are really only two reasons to watch "Men in Black 3": The first being the standout performances of Brolin, who is a shoe-in to one day play Tommy Lee Jones in the Tommy Lee Jones story, and Jemaine Clement (The Flight of the Conchords) who plays the witty and grotesque (best villain of the series) Boris The Animal. The second reason being, for how lackluster and ill conceived the plot of "Men in Black 3" seems for about an hour, the twist in the final act is one of the most pleasantly surprising payoffs in any sci-fi movie I have seen since the 90's. I hesitate to say that this ending is so good that it makes up for the rest of this below average film, but...it sort of does.
Final Thought: "Men in Black 3" is a horse that starts the race off slow, but finishes strong. And while I don't see this horse winning any races among critics (and maybe I've just used one too many horse racing analogies for my own good) if you are a fan of the Men in Black series, "Men in Black 3" will be something worth wasting a Saturday afternoon watching. On the other hand, if "Men in Black 2" was in your mind, "just OK", then don't waste your time with this film.
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