***SPOLIER*** WOODY FINALLY DROPS A BOLLO*K - awful awful awful

Rating: 2/10 (1 December 2005)

Saw this a couple of nights ago in London and am still in shock how truly bad it is. I'm a huge Allen fan and feel like Star Wars fans must have done when they first saw the Phantom Menace. I think there's a reason it's going down well in France and elsewhere because it's totally laughable to anyone who knows London. It's not Manhattan - we don't all flag cabs (especially if you work in a shop) because it's so damn expensive. And all the scenes set in front of London's most obvious landmarks - Houses of Parliament, the Gherkin etc - give me a break.
But the main problem is the plot - crow barring in an opera's storyline doesn't make it believable. Jeez - we were all laughing at how unconvincing the decision to commit murder was. And then when the ghosts turn up... What the hell...? I think the main problem was the lead actor, although getting saddled with such atrocious dialogue can't have been much fun. On the good side, Scarlett did pretty good. I just hope the next two - TWO! - films Allen's making in London with her are better than this pretentious crap.
And the dreadful dialogue between the cops - what the hell. But the standout moment, when we had the biggest unintentional laugh of the night, was when our anti-hero says, "As Sophocles says..." Maybe people in Manahattan have been feeling like this about Allen's movies for 30 years? I hope not as he's made some of my favourite films.
Right - I'm off for a lie down in my shrink's office...