More of a double bagel

Rating: Null/10 (31 December 2005)

Only tennis fans will get that line, but then this film uses tennis, both as a minor plot point, and as a metaphor for life's unique twists and turns. In fact, the whole premise of this film is that so much of what happens to us happens by complete chance that it is much better to be lucky than good, a phrase no small number of tennis players and commentators have used over the years.
"Match Point," Woody Allen's new film, has gotten hailed by some critics as a return to form and by others for breaking new ground, at least for Woody. Writing for once not about neurotic Manhattanites, Allen this time has moved his serious comedy of manners to England, where it belongs. The plot, in a nutshell is this, failed and somewhat lazy tennis pro Chris Wilton, through a number of strokes of luck, falls in with a very wealthy family that takes a shine to him. Before long, he's headed to the alter with the family's pretty, charming, but slightly patronizing daughter, and also on his way to a new career as a pampered corporate executive, although exactly what business he is in never seems to be spelled out.
That's pretty much the story for the first half of the movie, nothing but dumb luck taking the tennis pro, Jonathan Rhys Meyers, to the top, at least of the corporate rankings. Where things start to get sticky is when he falls for the girlfriend of the son of the family, an American actress named Nola. He even has a one afternoon stand with her, boffing her in a wheat field of all places in the middle of a heavy rain storm. But he goes ahead and marries the rich girl anyway, but then his brother-in-law dumps Nola and Chris finds himself obsessed with her. That leads to lies, deceptions and the finally, a major crime and then some.
First, lets deal with the acting. Rhys Meyers is fine as the ex-tennis pro, although not exactly dynamic. But then, his part doesn't call for it. Had he been depicted as the poor boy from Ireland who fought and maneuvered and clawed his way into the upper ranks of London society, it would have been a much more interesting film. Instead, he's depicted as a guy who was too lazy for the travel and hard work of the ATP tennis tour, so he becomes a teaching pro and the world just becomes his oyster. Again, that's the premise of the film and it might even be true in some rare cases, but it is not particularly exciting to watch on screen. It's also all been done better before, specifically in George Stevens version of "An American Tragedy," which was released about 1950 as "A Place in the Sun." In "Match Point," there is nobody to cheer for, because the central character is not only a less than admirable character, but he's also basically a reactive, rather than an active character. Luck may exist, but it isn't all that interesting to watch as it unfolds.
Supporting character Mathew Goode is good and Emily Mortimer in some ways delivers the best performance of the film as Chris' spoiled rotten, wife. Then comes the matter of the highly talented Scarlett Johansson as Nola, the American actress who for some unexplained reason, thinks London is the center of the film world. Even after being dumped by her boyfriend, she keeps coming back to England. Never mind New York, or, dare we say the word, Hollywood, she thinks all the acting jobs are in England.
Johansson delivers one of her weakest performances in this film, starting off fairly strong, but playing the same note throughout the film. And when you think about it, her cynicism never really rings true from the beginning. Why would a girl about to marry into such a wealthy family be so negative all the time. Couldn't an actress do a little more to win over the skeptical mother-in-law?
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Then comes the big finish, in which Chris, who has had a torrid affair with Nola, finds out she is preggers and is about to blow his cover. So he shotguns both her and her neighbor to death and tries to make it look like a burglary gone bad. No, you didn't misread this. That's what happens. And as improbable as that is, the story gets worse. The subsequent police investigation of a particularly brutal double homicide quickly clears Chris. Even though there is enough evidence to make this a case right out of Detective 101, the cops just let him go. Apparently in London, no autopsies are performed on the bodies of murder victims, which of course would have shown that Nola was pregnant and of course, Chris was the main suspect. Secondly, even after he admits to the police he was having an affair with Nola, they never ask about his alibi for the time of the crime nor apparently make any effort to check it out.
I would guess the Bobbies never solved a murder case, which must come as something of a surprise to every English detective from Sherlock Holmes to Robbie Coltrane's character in "Cracker."
At any rate, I don't think Woody Allen is back and I don't think he made his case for everything being all about luck. I didn't feel lucky wasting my time in this film.