At first laughably bad, then just plain depressing.

Rating: 3/10 (28 February 2014)

I've had nightmares since watching it about having to watch this again. Why Zack Synder gets a hint of attention I don't know. Watchmen was disappointingly mediocre and 300 is one of the worst films I've ever seen. I dread to think of watching any of his other films. I don't know why I had even a tiny bit of hope for Man Of Steel back in the Summer but the mixed reaction proved that he has not learned. He is, undeniably and only, a visual director (and maybe if his sources and scripts were better he might have a chance at making a decent film one day) but unfortunately his taste in visuals is pure dreck. He tries to assimilate some emotion into the picture of Man Of Steel, but it's all on the surface, and there's no heart to be found. I quite like Superman, I haven't seen Donner's 1978 hit but I did enjoy Singer's Returns at the time. However, there's not an ounce of joy to be found in Synder's film and the plot too often doesn't make sense at all. Why does Superman care about humanity? Why don't the residents of Krypton encase themselves in the protective shields that they put their prisoners in? Why tell Zod that Superman even exists?
It's just one contrivance after another for the disheartening result of destruction porn. These are laughable contrivances too, the script constantly had me laughing as to how serious it was taking everything with applying modern techno mumblejumbo. The whole movie is just clunky exposition drenched in melodrama without any character development. It can never find its footing with the pace, either wallowing in meaningless drivel or propelling us into tensionless mania. Terrible idea to jump back and forth with flashbacks. Even if the film did work, all it wants you to feel is depressed. Where's the hope? The only people I feel sorry for are the VFX team. I hate the filters, terrible angles and annoying zooms Synder and his cinematographer put over their hard work. Nothing particularly special, given what they're used for, but it's always a lot of admirable effort involved. Wish they could've scrubbed the most obvious product placement in the history of film out at the very least. Just give me a break, especially with those trite religious undertones. Shame on everyone else involved. Nolan, you're on thin ice after The Dark Knight Rises. Please pick up the pace with Intersteller. Please. Worst film of the year right here.
3/10