YIKES!!! Here are some things I learned from this mess!

Rating: 6/10 (14 June 2013)

I really wanted to like this movie but it was such a huge mess of over-the-top destruction sequences that it just isn't engaging. In retrospect, some of the plot is so nonsensical its absurd and humorous! The final act reminded me of a gag from the Powder-Puff girls where they destroy the entire city in process of trying to save it. Some things I learned from MAN OF STEEL: 1. ZOD is a Space Jockey. 2. SUPERMAN is a savior. He's, you know, like Jesus. 3. If you need to banish some people to the 'Phantom Zone' the most unreliable prison/transport going is the giant jet-powered dildo. 4. No, no...You don't understand! SUPERMAN is a lot like Jesus, sacrificing himself for us. ... 5. Violent acclimation to new climates transports Kryptonians to a magical hallucinatory farm land where you can have real conversations with phantoms of people - especially those who reveal that they are basically Hitler, which inevitably transforms the ground into a sea of skulls that superheros drown in. Also said acclimation causes blood to be vomited and everything explained during said hallucination is expository fact that drives the plot. 6. When trying to save someone's life, the most secure place to fly them to, is a barn that houses exactly what the threat to their lives is after. Just say "You'll be safe here." 7. People often worry about what would happen if the world were confronted with Martians. But as it turns out, its not social mayhem at all. Other Martians come looking for those Martians and then basically destroy civilization fighting - but so long as some of those martians are nice to us, we'll forgive them! 8. NYC is the hot spot for Terraformers! 9. NYC and KANSAS are practically neighbors! 10. The neckline of SUPERMAN'S suit was crafted with sexy in mind. 11. Pam is seriously two-timing Jim and he should be worried. 12. Bless me Father, but if I sacrifice myself to save the world, will I be like Jesus? ANSWER: Yes. 13. If you have a 'World Creator' (or whatever) terraform-machine, and can basically terraform ANY planet, the logical next step for anyone, is to choose to use the planet that's already inhabited. 14. Advanced Alien technology can easily terraform ecosystems, build intergalactic spaceships, create artificial childbirth, store unborn babies in the cells of newborn babies to later be harvested anytime throughout eternity, but they can't figure out how to get a satellite to broadcast to a television.
****SPOILER ALERT****
15. Breaking someone's neck is at least 10x more tragic for a superhero than say killing thousands of innocent people in NYC in an alien bar brawl.