Some more cheese, please.

Rating: 2/10 (23 June 2013)

Where to begin? Hack Snyder has successfully managed to drop a steaming pile of deuce on a classic, archetypal hero, and get way with it.
Heresy.
Treason, dare I say.
Might as well take an Aston Martin, strip it to its core, refashion its frame, add some pink upholstery, then mold it into the shape of... an ice cream truck... emblazoned with pictures of Justin Bieber, paint the word "smile" on the side, and take it for a drive, around the ghetto.
What an unfounded, puerile hack. Anyone who gave this guy creative license to inject his petty, homo-erotic obsessed brand of wanna-be (i.e., 300, the equivalent of an oily pimple on the posterior of its epic predecessor, Gladiator) into the muscle of a cherished icon, should be dipped in raspberry honey, drug across a field of fire ants, and thrown into a volcano. Then, regurgitated by the volcano, and used to fertilize the dog doo, that fertilizes the soil.
Wash, rinse, repeat.
His transgression, is near unconstitutional.
Adding vinegar to the "Oh No, They Didn't" wound, was the abysmal costume and set design on the planet Krypton. Are you serious. Painting stuff black does NOT detract from its gaudiness. Note: "gaudy" lies on the opposite end of the spectrum from "gritty realism".
(BTW, why on earth would Jor El reveal to Zod that he just shot his baby into space? Lol.)
Opening 20 minutes. WTF.
How this hack weaseled his way into becoming a financially viable Hollywood option, not to mention having the gall to welcome what marketing reps bestow upon him as a label of "visionary" is Wow. Just, wow.
Hey kids, watch me speckle this dog turd with gold paint I'm a visionary. Help me take your money, further feed my self-delusion, and perpetuate this charade.
Dear, Zod. Guess Kryptonians sport goatees now?(Lol) Not even light years within Cumberbatch's Khan. Fassbender's Magneto.
This is not Shannon's fault.
(I realize my venting may be overkill. Then again, maybe not. It could be warranted.) Placing Snyder at the helm of one of the most cherished franchises (the "S" is the 3rd most recognized symbol in the world) is tantamount to hiring a pee-wee league coach with a sophomoric, part-time understanding of the game to coach the Lakers, whose every aspect down to the brand of deodorant and scented toilet paper he buys wreaks of tackiness (axe body spray, anyone?). This hack believes he's on par with hall-of-fame caliber coaches, gets paid large quantities of cash, meanwhile raises ticket prices and merchandising, all to coach your favorite team (not to mention, after a decade-long drought). He hypes the team all pre season, then runs a solid franchise into the ground. A colossal, wasted expenditure.
Why did Nolan allow this embarrassment to see the light of day? Apparently, to beef up his wallet. And, possibly, just possibly, he knew Snyder would tarnish this iconic franchise, and in the process, further distance himself and cement Nolan's place as top dawg of the superhero genre. These are the only, feasible answers I can muster. Complete error in judgment, aside.
What few redeeming qualities of this film, there were.
................................................
Henry Cavill's performance. Great. Just, great. Humble. Deserving.
Yet, not enough to drag Snyder's pathetic tuckus across the finish line.
The film, despite the sheer scale of its inanity, its self-absorbed, grotesque, insecure delivery of the source material (emanating from Snyder), was effective in at least accentuating Kal El's sense of morality. That much I concede. The writers were able to create a psychological texture that humanized the awkward evolution of Kal El's powers. This aspect, earned its "realism". Contending with his understanding of free will, responsibility, and sacrifice emphasized the qualities that distinguished his character.
Mr. Snyder, please take this one back. On behalf of the council, we implore you.