Horrible ! Horrible !

Rating: 3/10 (24 July 2008)

Icky, sticky, gooey, and lighter-than-air. Oh, and, almost meaningless. I went to see Meryl Streep,who, ordinarily could read the phonebook and make it compelling. I don't know what possessed her(?) Could the greatest actress of my time lack judgement, completely? Would she really rather be a singer? Her gentle parlando is pretty good. The big, over-the-top numbers had me grimacing and wincing. Musicals, I would think, should have people who can sing, and I mean really well. There were some good voices, Colin Firth, Christine Baranski, the daughter character. Most of the rest reminded me of why needed Marni Nixon.Actors want to be singers and singers want to be actors. There are only a handful who can do both, successfully. I don't think a singer has to have a pristine voice, necessarily, "Acting" a song makes it real, so, I am a little conflicted. I just expect to hear better-than-average musicianship, when I go to a musical.That only makes sense. Would you tolerate bad violin playing at the symphony? PierceBrosnan, if that was his real voice, is a freak of nature. He sounded like he was playing Bluebeard the Pirate whenever he sang. I was literally afraid another musical number would ensue with him in it, and yet, I was giddy for all the wrong reasons. I've never heard someone vomit lyrics before. Okay, enough bashing of singers. Now, I have an unusual comment. Meryl Streep looked really weird. Her skin tone looked sickly to me. It was very distracting.And,I did not like watching my favorite actress debasing herself with this saccharine, melodramatic, cartoon of a movie.I don't understand how she could amaze me in so many roles and then, utterly disappoint me in this thing. Is it direction?
The few shots of the actual outdoors of Greece, or Corfu, or wherever were quite beautiful. It's true, the outdoor shots actually did enhance this movie. The soundstage shots were obvious.
Christine Baranski stole the show. Imagine that !Just like when she stole it from another over-acting blonde who could only kinda-sorta sing. Her singing was really quite fine, and she performed in what I considered the best musical bit in the whole movie.
I love musicals. I don't need bombs and chase scenes to make me happy. I've seen lots and lots of them. This musical falls short of the mark. I'm sure it scored very well with it's intended audience.
Meryl, Julie, you are two of the greatest actresses of our time....WTF?