Severely disappointed

Rating: 2/10 (1 January 2004)

I went to see this movie on a rainy day in an attempt to cheer myself up. Judging by the trailers and reviews, I was expecting a great, feel-good film. What I got was a different story.
I got a mangled plot, abandoned storylines, unnecessary sex jokes and swearing, boring one-dimensional characters... And only two people managed to make me laugh- UK TV presenters Ant and Dec. I cared nothing for any of the characters or storylines, save Hugh Grant, but he is wonderful at romantic comedy (pah! this film was not so much romcom as boringblurb) and I enjoy watching him. What of the porn-stars, who had plenty of time spent on them at the beginning, only to be abandoned for what must have been at least an hour? Kris Marshall, who is brilliant in the UK series "My Family", was given a plot and dialogue so ridiculous I had to shut my eyes and pretend it wasn't happening. Keira Knightley was wooden, as usual, but add that to a messy story and it was bordering on painful. Even the usually wonderful Alan Rickman was dull.
This story seemed to be entirely about sex jokes, swearing and being unfaithful. After nearly 2 hours, I couldn't bear it any more and left the cinema.
Love Actually would've been much better off with half the stories- in fact, no, it would've been better if this diabolical mess had never been made. Atrocious and outstandingly disappointing.
2/10 (just for Hugh Grant's "Jump" sequence and Ant + Dec)