One of the worst films ever made

Rating: 1/10 (8 January 2006)

After seeing this I wanted to inflict actual bodily harm on Richard Curtis. I'm not joking. I really, really did. Love Actually is the vilest, most ghastly, most putrid film I have ever seen. It is appalling. The nadir of Curtis's output, it is a toe-curling abomination. Where to start? What about the pure, undiluted cynicism of the enterprise, evident in everything from the music to the manipulative sentimentality to the use of children to the Christmas setting. It's a film with no heart, no structure, no sense, just a series of orchestrated, contrived scenes, augmented by the odd stale comic line (eg 'Now I can only get into dresses that belonged to Pavarotti') and utterly stupid improbabilities. To go through those would take way, way too long. And what's with the use of bad language in the most inappropriate of situations? Do not see this vomit-inducing turkey of a movie, especially in a couple if you're a man because it may well end your relationship, which would actually be quite ironic, eh Mr Curtis?