Where's my Insulin shot ?

Rating: 1/10 (24 September 2005)

After viewing this movie I wanted to push Kate Winslet off the bow of the Titanic just as Leo asked if she trusted him . I hoped that Elliott and the E.T. would get shot out of the sky when they did the flying bicycle stunt . I hoped that everything that was sweet and good would be replaced by evil and darkness . Love Actually was so cloyingly sweet that I had the dry heaves for several hours afterwards . And what in the world is Laura Linney and Liam Neeson doing in this picture ? Didn't Liam Neeson read the script before he agreed to play the father to the most annoying child of all time ? There's always a tendency to make children play older than their biological age . See Jerry Maguire , Sleepless in Seattle and Field of Dreams . But does the kid have to be so much smarter than the parent ? Cute kids really put me off . And of course the Director ties everything up in a pretty pink bow in the last ten minutes . All the male characters come to their respective senses and rush to the airport to profess their love for the girl that they'd been staring dreamily into space for . God , that hurts . Can't Colin Firth and Hugh Grant ever get killed or maybe get AIDS or get run over by one of those double - decker buses . Oh please God , let me make a movie . I promise you it won't have a happy ending .