'Law Abiding Citizen' takes implausibility to the next level, and it isn't funny.

Rating: 3/10 (9 August 2012)

This film is silly, and not in a good way. Any film you have criticised in the past for farfetchedness or implausibility will be put into perspective by this truly ludicrous film.
Firstly, all characters are wholly flat and featureless; there is no depth or anything of interest in any of them, the film comprises only stock characters. Gerard Butler co-stars as 'Clyde Shelton', a seemingly omnipotent God-like figure who appears to be stronger and more capable than the FBI, the Philadelphia Police Department and various other judicial bodies combined. There's a line of dialogue that acknowledges this absurdity, but that doesn't make it okay. Shelton is on a mission to correct the judicial system, which he deems to have failed him after the murder of his wife and child. His extraordinary tactility and expertise are tenuously explained in a scene that gives a clichéd back story of how he was a human disposal expert, the character predictably saying "He was the best".
His superhuman capabilities are all very convenient, but I don't think he's all that bright, because he clearly makes everything much harder for himself. Once the credits roll, it becomes apparent that the plot has one gaping hole, there was no reason for Clyde Shelton to want to be in prison, it would be completely illogical for him to want to be there; you'll know what I'm talking about if you decide to see it. Besides this fatal flaw, there are also the ways in which he exacts revenge, which become increasingly nonsensical and boring as the film progresses.
All of this absurdity is fatally compounded by the fact it takes itself seriously. I expected to enjoy this film in a similar way I enjoyed 'Commando', a film which is implausible too, but works through caricatures, hilariously bad acting and fantastically corny one-liners. In 'Law Abiding Citizen', however, there is barely a grain of humour. Despite this, the film does provide one laugh, a scene in which a particularly irritating character is inexplicably killed by a maliciously modified mobile phone.
This humourless and unbelievably far-fetched narrative prevents you from engaging with 'Law Abiding Citizen' on any level. Placing its tongue in cheek just occasionally may have been its salvation, but unless there is a drastic director's cut someday it will remain a brain dead pile of cheap viscera with a hugely generous IMDb score that speaks volumes for people's taste.
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