This should be aka Buckets of Blood, Part 1

Rating: 8/10 (10 May 2004)

There could be something here that amounts to a SPOILER, but there's not much mystery about or in Kill Bill to spoil.
Somebody in special effects decided that humans have enough blood and pressure to spray like a broken fire hydrant if a body part gets hacked off. It is so unreal it is in a way less disturbing than a realistic depiction. The best example is the accountant that loses an arm; if you think about what ensues, she lost enough blood for 10 people.
The massive sword fights make it clear that the heroine is invincible, executing perfect multiple dismemberments, leaps and bounds that Peter Pan would be proud of while barely breaking a sweat. Except for just a few of the top evildoers, armies of swordspeople have no chance against her. There must've been some Criminals Only Get Swords rule in effect because hardly any guns were used at all.
The best fights are the one-on-one duels. Kill Bill starts off with a kickass fight sequence that would be the grand finale for lesser movies.
The fights are the only reason to watch Kill Bill. There was one scene though that reminded me of 'Samurai Submarine Sandwich Shop' or whatever that comedy skit was called. They didn't quite go through with chopping up the food with a sword, but I thought they might and it would've been hilarious. Tarentino has such a sick sense of humor it probably wouldn't have fit in, but if you can get past the bloodsprays there's more ultradark comedy here than it may first appear.
I gave Kill Bill an 8/10, or 87%, a brick or two shy of excellent, but it might go up if Kill Bill 2 delivers.