Crayola Havoc

Rating: 2/10 (26 March 2008)

Uma Thurman is Clint Eastwood in drag in this blood drenched comic book of a movie about revenge that is as stale as the the 30 year old low budget chop socky garbage it emulates.
On her wedding day the pregnant Bride (Thurman) has her reception ruined when her old employer Bill (CEO of an assassination bureau) has his squad of flunkies shoot up the festivities. All present are killed with the exception of The Bride who remains in a coma for a few years. When sleeping beauty eventually arises all hell breaks loose. Determined to exact revenge on former co-workers in warrior fashion she embarks on a bloody path from the States to Japan.
Movie boy wonder of the last decade, Quentin Tarantino, is a prime example of how far American Cinema has fallen since its late seventies collapse. Critics have sung his praises far and wide as a new voice with a fresh approach. Having achieved iconic pop culture and auteur status Kill's full title is Quentin Tarantino's 4th Film Kill Bill 1. Welles and Ford never got that type of billing and Hitchcock didn't earn it until his fiftieth film. Not QT, he's a phenom. I however must respectfully disagree.
Bill is very colorful and surreal most of the time which dilutes its effect, kills the realism and turns the characters into solemn cartoon characters. Tarantino's dialogue is his typical profanity laced paragraphs that nuanced slightly could be interchanged with all his other profanity laced scripts of threat and bravado. His visuals go from tedious posing to nostalgic kung fu chaos seasoned in buckets of blood. They have the sophistication of a disturbed 9 year old who has troubles staying within the lines of his coloring book. In addition to Thurman's Eastwood sex change he evokes the style and pacing of the lumbering work of Sergio Leone from start to finish. As a comic book Kill Bill 1 would be a page turner. The only thing it turns as a film in the adolescent hands of Tarantino is one's stomach.