The Superhero Movie Killer

Rating: 2/10 (9 November 2018)

I am not a DCEU hater. On the contrary, I have enjoyed each film in the DCEU more than the last. I liked Man of Steel, I loved Batman v. Superman, I loved Suicide Squad several times more and I consider Wonder Woman the best live action comic book film since Spider-Man 2...But boy, do I hate Justice League. I've hated it ever since I first saw it and it gets worse and worse the more I actually think about it. It's to the point where I'm starting to believe that Justice League may very well be the spark that brings out the downfall of the entire superhero movie genre. It's that terrible.
There are small things to enjoy here and there, but nothing that would constitute giving Justice League a positive review. Ezra Miller is perfect casting as The Flash. He's an adorable, hilarious and endearing avatar for the fans and the film gets considerably more enjoyable when we get to appreciate this universe through his wide, brown, doe eyes. Miller definitely has a real screen presence and completely steals the show acting wise. Ray Fisher's Cyborg may as well be a completely different character from the fun loving, light hearted character of the comics, but Fisher does a very convincing job in the role and does give the character some genuine emotional depth that the rest of the League sorely lacks. He has excellent chemistry with Gadot's Wonder Woman (Who is also mostly good here) and it's refreshing to see a friendly, chemistry rich male/female relationship in a comic book movie with no romantic connotations. While the characterization for Momoa's Aquaman is completely non-existent, Momoa at least has some charisma and charm in his nothing role, more than enough to justify his casting.
Ben Affleck...What happened? I genuinely love him as an actor, I found him great in both Batman v. Superman and Daredevil, but he is terrible here. There is absolutely no energy or life to his performance at all. His two emotions in this film are bored and toxically masculine smartass. I'm amazed that he could go from the best Batman to date to nearly reaching Clooney levels of poor. This is very clearly do to a writing and directing standpoint, which go out of their way to make Batman a joking and lighthearted character when that just isn't who he's supposed to be. We can thank Whedon for that.
Henry Cavill is similarly awful in this movie, despite impressive performances in both Man of Steel and Batman v. Superman. His forced attempts at anger and hostility that come right out of nowhere (In an extremely bizarre and seemingly out-of-left left field homage to Pet Sematary) and that awful CGI lip doesn't make his sneers any more intimidating. Later on, when the film needs him to be jokey and optimistic, the turn feels far too abrupt and sudden and Cavill's performance may as well be anti-charisma.
With Justice League and Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance to his name, Ciaran Hands is slowly making a name for himself as the guy you get when you want an uninteresting and phoned in villain. Justice League somehow manages to ripoff Loki from The Avengers and make him even less interesting. As much as I disliked Loki, Tom Hiddleston at least gave a fair amount of screen presence, character and personality to the role. Ciaran Hands' Steppenwolf is a big, grey, CGI horned bad guy who wants to destroy the world for barely discussed reasons who delivers nearly every line in the exact same growly, pissed off attitude. Everything from his design to his strategy to his performance is lazy, uninventive and boring. Why would Justice League choose a villain this unknown if they weren't going to do anything with him?
If you've seen the trailer for Justice League, you already know everything that happens in it. Batman assembles the Justice League. Steppenwolf wants to collect mother boxes to destroy the Earth. The Justice League fights Steppenwolf. That's it. Nothing else. I find it both sad and laughable that the film went so far out of its way to never show us Superman in any of the marketing of the film when his return is about as unmemorable, unsignificant and emotionally unearned as possible. The film never gets going and never picks up anything resembling a pulse. It's like a bloated fish corpse floating above water for 2 hours.
This film has the same problems as The Avengers where instead of our favorite heroes actually bonding with one another or liking each other, Whedon thinks it's far more interesting to have most of them bicker and fight like 12 year olds for the entirety. This time, most of the belligerence at least comes from only one character; Batman. Good God, what have you done, Whedon? The intelligent, intimidating and wise character of the comics is now a whiny, insensitive, immature bully who seemingly starts fights just because he can. I should probably mention that Cyborg is the only character in the film who is remotely developed in any way. Flash very easily could have been with his relationship towards his imprisoned father, but it's practically never brought up again after his introductory scene.
Justice League is an absolute trainwreck. It's a catastrophic blow to both DC and superhero films in general and its noxious, formulaic awfulness will have a lasting effect on both for years. If The Avengers hurt comic book movies as a whole, Justice League (Bar from a few exceptions) may have very well killed them.