A Jurassic Turkey

Rating: 4/10 (16 January 2018)

Since the early '90's I've enjoyed the Jurassic Park novels and movies. Not only were they groundbreaking for their special effects but they were intelligent stories, which were well filmed and acted by a stellar cast. I even have to admit to enjoying the third film in the series, which a lot of people have put down. So, when I saw this episode was on the drawing board I was a happy bunny. However, when I saw the cast line up and the story synopsis I decided I'd wait until the film made it onto telly. Two years from the release and the movie is on... Boy, was I glad I waited(?) What the hell were the writers and director thinking of(?) There are so many holes in the story it leaks crap in the majority of scenes. The acting ranges from abysmal to average. And, the special effects appear to be below par for the time - the opening corvid shot is really horrendous.
Poor Michael Crichton is turning in his grave.
What the first three films showed was that Murphy's Law was more than prevalent on an island where dinosaurs roamed. So what do we find when the film starts(?) The park is open and has been running for a few years. You just know they've been lucky so far and that their luck is soon to run out. Then we learn the scientists are creating new "Dinosaurs" to keep the punters happy and spending their money. I can hear Malcolm screaming now, "Will these idiots ever learn?" - Evidently not Malcolm. Even worse is that on the other side of the island they're trying to train raptors. Though we're never really told why they're being trained, there is a military element which wants them as weapons (yawn, what else(?)...). I think it's because somebody had a great idea for a CGI scene later in the film... and this is the only way they could link it in.
This leads me to the CGI Choreography because this is what it is. There are sometimes when it's just way too overcooked to be believable. The nannies, Zara's (Katie McGrath) dance of death is a particular case in subject. For me, this was just ludicrous and stupid.
Back to the errors in the story, saying that there were no "Dangerous" animals on the island so the customers were never at risk was an outright lie. Claire (Bryce Dallas Howard), who runs the island actually believes this, even though the latest creation, which she signed off on, is very dangerous... as well as the raptors... which she also knew about... then at the climax of the film... well, this is one woman you shouldn't trust - ever.
One annoying thing, for me, was when Claire reprimands a colleague for wearing an antique Jurassic Park T-Shirt because it could be upsetting to the customers because people died there. The thing is, he never mingles with the vacationers. Secondly, the voice on the tannoy, at one point, actually welcomes everybody to Jurassic Park - Not Jurassic World!
I also hated the kids in this film. A geek and a trainee stalker. At least with the original kids, Tim and Lex you could relate to them, this, on the whole, is because there were well written and well acted. Grey (Ty Simpkins) and Zack (Nick Robinson) are pretty two dimensional and boring, which can also be said for the rest of the cast, especially Claire. Only Chris Pratt, as Owen, and Vincent D'Onofrio, as Hoskins, give decent performances, though their characters are very cliched.
This is one boring, seen it all before, cliche-ridden film that I'd not recommend to anyone - even if the end scene is quite entertaining. I'll not watch this again and I cannot believe there's a sequel in the pipeline.