Deus Rex Machina

Rating: 9/10 (30 December 2007)

You don't need me to tell you that "Jurassic Park" (hereafter JP) has indelibly ensconced itself in humanity's consciousness. You don't have to be a paleontology or prehistoric animal or dinosaur buff (as I am), or have seen JP in the theater after waiting at 10 p.m. in insanely snaky long lines (as I did) or own the VHS video or Michael Crichton novel that inspired JP (as I do) to appreciate the movie's special status in movie lore as the font of realistically animated extinct beasts. Yep, JP is immortal. But it is not perfect. Why? Well, it's the insidiously asinine and anticlimactic climax! Our intrepid team has cleverly eluded the velociraptors throughout the extended chase sequence at the island center culminating in the atrium with the Tyrannosaurus skeleton. However, the cunning theropods have surrounded the team. How does the team escape? One more brilliant plan? No! The T-rex which masticated and spit out the tour jeeps earlier in the movie materializes behind them out of nowhere to chomp and spit out the raptors and smash his skeletal relative, and provide the necessary distraction for our crew to flee!!! Our toothy savior! Wow, how does a 3-7 ton slavering monster sneak behind you unnoticed? How did he get into the atrium anyway? Presumably, he must have broken through a back wall. But why? What is his motivation? Why follow puny humans when he has his pick of fleshy hadrosaurs, ornithomimids, or ceratopsians? Admittedly, the sequence is exciting, but it really is just a dumb version of the "dinosaur in the machine".
I understand Spielberg was so enamored of the T-Rex that he couldn't resist bringing it back for the JP climax. Shame on him! :0 He should have resisted the urge. Even the center exploding would have been better.
Is it too late to make or discover an alternate ending?