It's A Baby

Rating: 1/10 (5 July 2009)

OK, so after nearly two years of every now and again hearing how WONDERFUL and revolutionary this film was from my very baby loving teenage friends, I decided to sit down and watch it premier on the TV. Having heard that Juno delves into the issues of underage sex, adoption, teenage pregnancy and growing up, I was a little confused when it seemed that the point of the movie wasn't to educate kids on the need for protection, as I thought a movie based on such a sensitive subject would be, no the point of this film was to cram as much pop culture in an hour and a halves space and create some new trendy saying with the hope that in a week every kid out there will be quoting "For shizz" "Yo yiggidy yo" "Wizard" and friggin "Home skillet".
My main problem with this film is it's complete disregard for the seriousness of the subject it's based upon. Teenage pregnancy is a horrible issue and I personally have seen no less than seven girls drop out of high school to have a child, the pain and emotional trauma they went through, along with the bullying and often the exile they are forced into, lets not forget the anger they face by their parents, are all made light of with this film. This film has no depth, no compassion and no message for the people watching it besides, babies have fingernails.
Another problem is Juno only comes across as realizing that she is actually pregnant at one point in the entire film, and that seems accidental. The moment takes place when Juno is telling her father and step mother she is pregnant and Juno says the line "I'm not ready to be a mum." this is the only moment in the entire film, Juno seems to acknowledge what she is actually going through, Juno should be about to become a mother, but the fact that she is so quirky and into pop culture seems to make her strong and beyond maternal instinct and love from a mother to her child and enables her to walk around for the rest of the film with disregard for her unborn son, with the only evidence she is actually pregnant being her growing belly.
Most of the characters where unrealistic, annoying or plain weird for no obvious reason. The character of Juno is kind of like that girl everyone had in class, the one who was so anti mainstream and disapproving of anyone who liked something made by 'the man' plus her quirky one liners and ridiculous pop culture T shirts make her seem less and less like an actual human. Juno's best friend is a typical blonde, cheerleader, who for no explained reason has a thing for teachers, it would have added a bit of depth if the reason she has a thing for older men had been delved into, maybe she doesn't have a father figure or she is trying to run from a bad experience with a boy her own age, but no, the issue is simply left mentioned and never explained thus making a possibly traumatic problem a quirky little fact. Then Bleaker, some kid who seems to do nothing but run around in ridiculously short gold shorts, eat tic tacs constantly and is obsessed with Juno, going so far as to keep her underwear and lie on his bed holding it while looking at her year book picture, he has as much personality as a tooth pick and he lets himself be pushed around by everyone, his mother, Juno, the kids at school and when he finally tries to stick up for himself, Juno shuts him down by saying nearly on the verge of tears "I'm a planet" referring to her ever growing baby bump as if it is all his fault when she has confessed to planning the entire thing yet didn't bring a rubber to the occasion. Finally the potential adoptive father, the failed rock star, forced to sell out and compose jingles for advertisements for things such as deodorant and some type of food called Brunch, not only does this guy bail on his wife while they are in the process of adopting a baby because at nearly 40 he still wants to start a rock band and win a bunch of Grammy's, he gets a crush on the mother of the baby who is two years under the legal consent age in America, making him a dirty old guy border lining on would be pedophile, who was going to adopt the friggin baby.
The whole film is ridiculous, with facts mentioned and never explained, because explaining them would take away time for annoying one liners and stop the film being cute and might actually give it some depth. It was a waste of time and actually left me feeling rather angry, I hope very much that no girl watched this film and then decided when she was pregnant to give it up for adoption based on this film, because this film is so unrealistic, that girl will feel like a tone of bricks has hit her, where as with Juno, she avoids the bricks with the aide of quirkiness and pop culture simply pops our her child hands him over then gets with the father of the child and they play guitar and happy families, all over making this film is so unrealistic, I cant find words for it.