Borrrring

Rating: 3/10 (13 April 2017)

I just don't get reviews anymore. I used to agree with many and my taste was kind of in the mainstream. Movies like this though that have an 8 rating and really, are pretty terrible in every way, I just don't get.
The action is okay if you are into impossible fight scenes where the hero seems more like terminator than human. The ridiculous ways in which the hero survives each attack are way over the top. To add insult to injury each scene is dragged the f out until it seems like forever, including the scenes where he should just walk in and pop someone. Nooooooooo. He holds an 8 minute dialogue with them. How is that good, especially when it is Keanu and some other no talent actor or actress on screen with bad lines thrown in to boot? It's frickin torture. The acting is excruciatingly horrific. Not one of the actors made it seem real. The lines are just laughable but not in a good way. The only thing positive is the dog.
The movie honestly felt like it had been written by a ten year old or as if someone came through and dumbed it down, way down for its target audience (which judging from most of the reviews, it seems to have reached). Picture this (and no, it doesn't count as a spoiler because I'm paraphrasing): you have guy 1 talking to Wick and asking: "You're going after Santino Gregorio Mariano D'Antonio?" *overly shocked face*. Santino D'Antonio? Really? His sister by the way is G'ianna D'Antonio. Ridiculous names which someone thought would sound badass and cool. I bring it up, because that's the entire premise of the movie. A bunch of scenes taken from your favorite movies in the past, tweaked a little and thrown back in, in a comicy, hokey fashion. The only person who acted a little more naturally and seemed to deliver their lines (or maybe just had better lines) with some reality was Laurence Fishburne. He just seemed to be having fun with the whole thing as in WTH am I doing and aw, just go with it.
Again, the only thing that was worth seeing was the dog, oh, and Lance Reddick's toned down performance. Always perfection. Other than that, I really don't get what all the hubbub is about because it was just plain dumb.
John Wick 1 was immensely better.