Save yourself and watch original instead

Rating: 3/10 (8 March 2018)

If you like disjoint patchworks and jigsaws that don't quite fit together, you'll love this movie. None of the parts actually join up and the whole movie appears to have been put together as a series of takes with no one actually worrying about how to make them go together. I really wanted to like this movie but ultimately I went back and watched the original to remember how the pieces actually fit. I find it amazing that it could score a rating higher than 5 when it didn't really achieve any of it's goals.
It turns out to be a poor remake of Goonies meet Monster House. I can't wait for the sequel. It will probably involve the Loch Ness monster.