How could they mess this up so bad?

Rating: 3/10 (27 April 2013)

This is my first review and I'm writing it because the critics are all praising this film so much.
Let me tell you, if you like Iron Man in any way and/or are familiar with the mythology, do not pay to watch this film. This is a poor excuse of a plot that outright spits in the face of fans and destroys one of Marvel's most powerful villains. Seriously, the Mandarin is Tony Stark's antithesis; their conflict was always the symbol for magic vs. science. Like Joker's insanity contradicts Batman's great use of logic. In Iron Man 3 they ruined him so bad only a reboot could save the character (and believe me, I hate reboots as much as everyone). The Mandarin is now used as a joke character with the main twist just playing for laughs (or in my case, tears). This guy should have ten powerful magical rings that alone could rival the Avengers' powers combined. Was this "adaptation" really the best thing to do? Magic CAN be done on the big screen, they've done Norse Gods! Ten Rings are nothing compared to that...
Other than that, the film still wouldn't be good. Shane Black writes comedy action films, only this time the comedy is much more cringe worthy and not really funny, and the action probably sums up about 20% of the film. The main plot-device for armor malfunctions, power-downs and or stupid failures is so overused I was wondering how could they ever fill up 120 minutes without it. The actual Iron Man suit is so underused that you'll think this is Bourne or Bond you're watching. Also noteworthy: If a film relies on poop jokes for a quick laugh, it got as low as it'll ever get.
Also, I must say Rhodes (War Machine) needs a plot arc. He's a tool. I love Don's work in the role and think he's charismatic (as are RDJ and Gwyneth), but he needs to have some kind of a story.
Other new characters' besides the Mandarin are really hit and miss. This series' villains really have become one-note. We all know the bad guy is the one wearing the fancy suit that wants corporate power and tries to take over. Special mention goes to Maya, that one person who changes her mind all the time and leaves the film never having stepped in in the first place.
Wait, I'm not done yet. There's also a kid "side-kick" and you guessed it. He's in an hostage scene! Well, that's some good innovative writing right there! All in all, this is as bad or even worse than X-Men: The Last Stand. Beware of the actual ending that retcons everything about Tony's back-story. I don't know how Marvel green-lighted this script, I really don't! I know any fan could have done it much better!