"This is MY room!!" . . .

Rating: 6/10 (15 September 2013)

. . . so screams young Parker Crane (in his frilly dress and pigtails), as Norman Bates serves him a warrant in a plagiarism lawsuit during the last half of INSIDIOUS: CHAPTER TWO. Naturally, this line drew gales of laughter from the multiplex audience during my showing, by far its biggest response to the whole alleged "horror" flick. After all, the future "Mommie Dearest" serial killer (funny none of the 24 depicted women's relatives apparently ever filed missing person reports; funnier still that we were left totally in the dark as to how victims were selected or killed, other than that they were female and that their corpses were left sitting in chairs under white sheets in a neighborhood where none of the residents had the least sense of smell!) is confronted by Mr. Bates while playing in his "girly" bedroom during a rare moment when his "helicopter" mom is not hovering over him, trying to explain why the girl's name she's tagged him with doesn't even begin with the same letter as the boy's moniker with which his father christened him (and what IS the feminine version of Parker?--oh yeah, it's PARKER, as in the actress Parker Posey!).