I Am Pabulum: Fresh Prince Of The Apocalypse (spoilers)

Rating: 5/10 (26 December 2007)

Watch the first 20 minutes of this film carefully, because that's pretty much as good as it gets. Then you can go rent The Omega Man. It's a 36-year-old version of the same story, is laced with pretentious and vaguely right-wing undercurrents and cheesy effects, yet it's still a better film even with Charlton Heston as the protagonist.
The shame is that Will Smith really can act. Hey, I saw Ali, I know it can happen. But, if not for the obvious elements of the story, one would not know that his character lives in desperate solitude that borders on suicidal. Even his talking with mannequins or his dog comes off as quirky instead of the desperate attempt to cling to reality that it is. This inability to exemplify the desperation that is lurking just beneath the surface of Smith's obsessive dedication to duty, really ruins his character arc when, later in the film, he goes on a suicidal revenge quest. It makes no sense because there's been no emotional build up outside of the simply utilitarian dialogue and memory flashes.
But it's not all Smith's fault. Someone needs to yank the CG toys away from filmmakers, or at least convince them that big names, digital trickery and pop culture pandering cannot replace a good script.
I had temporary resurgence of hope when Smith was rescued from his failed suicide attempt. For just a moment it seemed that his rescuer had a hair lip or some imperfection that might wipe off the layer of superficiality that coated the film. But she turned out to be a vapidly beautiful woman with a vapidly charming young boy in tow, and she and Smith engaged in some equally vapid exchanges wherein we find that God has been talking to her. Ummm. anyway then comes time for the attack of the CG monsters and the film gets loud and brash and pretty pointless.
To be fair the action is OK, if rather predictable, and there are some great creepy moments, especially when Smith is navigating dark rooms filled with the infected. But IMO these moments get overshadowed by the over-doctored script, over digitized effects and the thematic pallor of the film. Omega Man at least engages the intellect with some philosophical arguments, as academic as they might be. "Legend" tries to make up for this lack of substance with innuendo, by Smith's love for Bob Marley. But even that comes off as pandering as opposed to making a subtle point.
I will admit it was absolutely amazing how they created an abandoned New York City. But I think 28 Days Later (a much better film made with a much smaller budget) stole their fire on that one.
If you're looking for a big budget escapist FX romp, go for it. It'll satisfy. But if you're seeking a good sci-fi film with subtext, intelligence and respect for the source material, as well as its audience, I'd keep looking.
And, please, someone hide the good books from Hollywood, before they film one again.