No, you are tale.

Rating: 4/10 (10 November 2015)

150 million dollars on this? A TWO-actor film?! Guess after Smith's paycheck and environment CGI, there wasn't much left.
The movie has so many problems...
1. Unbelievable.
I can't really imagine a faker loneliness. Want loneliness? Watch Moon. Rockwell nails the performance spot on. Smith is just... saying the lines, looking sad and stuff. Must've been good having a pet around.
Talking about pet - such a superdog who grew up with him for years... doesn't know that a dark place is bad? No, even better - it doesn't respond to basic commands? "No, stay"? Yeah... right. Oh and that pet wasn't exactly a chameleon, it was deadmeat the moment it entered the underground. Hiding under the table like a cat when the ghoul is two meters away is so believable, why didn't Smith hide there?
Smith is supposed to be stoic, tough, smart and inventive. He... uhm gets into his own trap? Then stays unconscious for hours until his watch wakes him up, all the while his dog barking literally nonstop? Yeah, he was shown to predict the clock time... while sleeping at night. That was hanging upside down with a barking dog. Then he gets himself down... sees that the time is probably bad and starts to... slither to the car? Pain or not, it should be pretty clear that he should probably walk on his hands but get his rear end out of there. Only at the very last moment he decides to stand up and hop on a single leg. Right... Then... as his dog dies defending him from his own stupidity, the best solution he finds is to suicide trying to kill some random ghouls? That's.... that's legend. Pure legend. Of course, he gets saved by a scripted girl. He then spends screen time trying to get around, pouting and promoting Shrek and Bob Marley. Of course, the question of arrival only occurred to him when the night fell, so he couldn't really prevent anything Tomorrowland style.
But the best part is the ending. Granted that the alternate ending is indeed too much fluff, the way he went out in theatrical is... as logical as the death of the scientist in Night of the Living Homeless. He had a gun... he had a crack in the glass. What about... shooting the glass? Throwing a grenade, timing it? Probably the glass would take most of the impact, he should've survived. No, I guess the best way a military colonel can go out is to blow himself up, makes sense.
And of course there's gotta be a happy end. Time to "listen", right?
2. Horrible narrative With such a short screen time, the amount of time wasted on his pointless family, on the mannequin rambling, on promotions and other pointless dialogue...
The movie begins, you sort start to enjoy it, try to understand it, you already know he's developed the cure, it can't be made more obvious, and by the time the action starts... you just get the forced plot shoving. Trapped?! Dog died?! He went bonkers?! He was saved?! He acts Shrek?! Oh, right, time to wrap it up, coal chute is safe... gg. Why even bother with the cure, when it's clearly safer and faster to exterminate the ghouls and reproduce... Weren't those sheltered - immune? Wasn't his cure - an after-effect on the ghouls, not some vaccine for healthy people?
3. Movie doesn't really get anywhere.
I thought it would be a great coincidence to watch this post apocalyptic flick before starting Fallout 4, the beginning was so smooth. But then it just went zombie flick before losing all sense as described above. So what part of that was legend? Like Age of Ultron lasting for about a.. week? - so this movie doesn't really fulfill the title. It's not a legend, more like a story of a failure scientist who really, really wanted to get that paycheck and acted the sharp script as good as he could...
I thought Riddick's dog was too cheesy, but damn... compared to this, Riddick looks like an Oscar material with low budget. If this movie can get 7\10 rating... why not give Night of the Living Deb 10\10?