Hostel - Bob's Review

Rating: Null/10 (11 July 2007)

This movie is about a couple of dudes who go to some European place (I think it was Sweden or Kazahkstan) to bang some hot chicks and sight see. The movie is kinda boring at first because no one gets killed but there are boobs so it's okay anyway because boobs rule. Then it gets really really boring because it's just lots of talking and stuff, and no boobs. But then the fun really begins because some dude gets his heels sliced up and another guy gets power drilled in the leg and it's totally gory and gruesome and stuff. Then there's this one guy (I think he was the main character 'cause he was played by that guy from Torque) who is about to be killed by a chainsaw but the chainsaw dude slips on Torque guy's fingers and the chainsaw lands on him (the chainsaw dude). That was hilarious.
The movie is deep and very thought provoking because it made me think about what would happen if I went to a hostel and was tortured by some crazy Dutch bastards (yes I know they weren't really Dutch but Goldmember rules so go f**k yourself). The torture scenes are really gross and totally awesome and the acting is very good. Especially Torque guy. I like when the Asian chick's eye just sorta hangs out of her socket, that was totally awesome. Although I didn't really understand the ending. I heard from a buddy that Eli Roth made a sequel but I can't see how it could live up to the standards of this film. Overall this is movie is very good and easily a must see for fans of gruesome horror
Bob