Why do I think the movie Hostel was not exactly the best?

Rating: 1/10 (4 April 2006)

Okay, someone bashed me for my comments on Hostel. I'll picture it vice versa so that I put YOU into my position and you can see Hostel from my point of view. This is how the HOSTEL would look like from the opposite point of view:
Imagine you go to the movies - you want to see a really scary horror movie. Now the movie you've heard of - it is supposed to be cool- is about Europeans coming to the USA.
Imagine you watch the movie: You see two young characters from Paris or London, they are obviously modern guys living in 21st century. They have cell-phones and Internet. Clearly, it's the world today. They set off to Canada by plane. They meet a third guy. Let's say he's European, too. They smoke pot and have sex with some girls.
Imagine you see them travel by steam train to New York City. After they arrive in Big Apple, you don't get to see Statue of Liberty. You do not even see Empire State Building anywhere. No Brooklyn Bridge, either. The river Hudson is a small brook. All you can really see are 10 - floor buildings. No skyscrapers, no highlights, no highways, no junctions.
In a hotel/hostel you see these European trio hook up with pretty ladies. They meet two Asian girls as well, but they don't like them. However, you are forced to notice that they have TVset with no remote in there and the actors on TV speak British. What's more, all New Yorkers speak British. Then the three main characters go to a disco. You can hear Elvis Presley's songs only in the disco. You may even catch a bit from Beach Boys, The Byrds, The Who, Troggs.
On the walls you see posters from Casablanca, Gone With The Wind or Elvis' movies.
After the disco you can see 10-year-old black, Indian and white kids begging in the streets of New Yor City, or even stoning people to death.
Then you watch the European trio end up on Manhattan - here they find a house in which they are tortured for money and pleasure. The sexy ladies torture them, too. Here come scenes exactly like in the actual Eli Roth's Hostel. For some it is scary, someone calls it disgusting, sadistic, still it's a horror scene so let's suppose you are quite satisfied.
After the torture and murders, one survivor and one Asian girl escape. They don't call police for help. They escape riding a 50 years old Ford Anglia. They just happen to run into the sadistic ladies who tormented them before and run them over with the old-fashioned automobile.On their escape, they ride through an old western-like road. They never see any highway and run into a police officer who looks rather like a Sheriff. They see him beat up some white-haired man for no apparent reason. There are 20years old automobiles all around.
Therefore they run past the police secretly and get to New York City steam-train station. The Asian girl sees her one-eyed, tortured self in a mirror-like wall and therefore commits suicide.
The European survivor sets off on the steam train away from New York City, meets the last villain on the train. He catches up with him in Canada, gets to him in the toilets and does his revenge. End of movie.
Now seriously, would Americans call a movie like this "a very good, professional horror"?
P.S.: And I am NOT against Eli Roth. I would be mad at anyone who lies about my country, no matter whether it's Roth or Mother Teresa.