Scream+bad makeup+nudity+lame ending=Hostel

Rating: 5/10 (23 January 2006)

After I read all the comments in this site about how graphic and brutal Hostel was, I was expecting at least something in the vein of Audition a movie with far better make up and way more perverse than this one, but instead all I've got is something like a Scooby Doo film with some gore and to be honest, lame gore. Cabin Fever was neat because at first you thought it was a slasher flick and it turned out to be something different. It was a fun trip. But Hostel seems like a video game. An absurd montage of gory scenes with no purpose at all, and it's not even disturbing or exciting. It's just stupid. There was some nice humor, like the Pulp Fiction part. I was laughing at that. Oh, and by the way I really don't understand why you people complain about all the nudity. That's a human body with no clothes on and that's it. Why do you find it so offensive? Maybe because there was almost no male nudity, but it's not something to be offended about. But it gets dull. Yeah, that I will give you. The eye part was the worst. I couldn't stop thinking about how fake it looked. Roth did a great job in Cabin Fever with special make up. But this is terrible. You can't get fooled by it.
The ending was far convenient for Paxton. I mean, I was waiting for a scene where the T -1000 would show up to help him through. It's not realistic, nor even suspenseful. You just know it's almost the end and can't wait for the titles to show up.
If you think this is real 'horror' and 'gore', you haven't seen a lot of flicks.