Not worth the time

Rating: Null/10 (13 April 2004)

Not having read the comic book Hellboy is based on, I went into this film with no preconceptions. I even went in thinking that the film would be a success if I at least was entertained. Too bad I was more solicitous than I should have been, because this film was a complete load of crap. One doesn't expect a lot of depth when it comes to comic book/action films, but the story was just lame. The Nazi angle could have been interesting, and the first ten minutes of the film were decent in an Indiana Jones kind of way, but the film quickly spiraled into complete tripe. Ron Perlman as Hellboy, who somehow still managed to look like Ron Perlman was just ridiculous. His corny remarks every five or ten minutes wore thin within ten minutes. I also don't think that one is supposed to fall asleep multiple times during a loud action film, but I was so bored (or perhaps it was a defense mechanism) that I did just that. I try to find one thing good (or bad, if it's actually a positive review) about a film, and Hellboy's good thing was the Nazi assassin. Had the film centered around him a bit more, I would have at least taken a bit of delight when this creepy monster was on the screen, but unfortunately I was forced to just listen to witty bon monts from Mr. Hellboy and try to figure out how much the fish guy was influenced by Greedo from Star Wars. Don't waste your time. This film isn't even remotely entertaining, and is beyond redemption.
--Shelly