Not sexy, not funny, not smart, not scary, not fun....

Rating: 2/10 (18 April 2004)

No, no, no, no, no...this is not the way to make a movie, even a comic book horror one.
One feels nothing for hellboy, nothing for the sidekick, nothing for the FBI agents...only the fire controlling girlfriend and fish man were somewhat interesting and sympathetic and John Hurt was wonderful...but everything else was muddled and so much dreck. If Hellboy can't get hurt no matter what, how can I care what happens to him. Once the gates of hell start to hope and the demons therefrom enter the sky, don't tell me everything gets all better just because someone doesn't put the final key in the extra lock...and don't forget to tell me beforehand that there is more than one lock so that I don't realize there is even any dramatic tension left to resolve after the first lock is opened....
anyway, I really don't get the positive reviews this one got on NPR and other places. Even "The Core" was more campy fun, and that is sinking rather low...