Contrived and cliched

Rating: 4/10 (20 October 2019)

I guess I'm one of the half dozen people in the world who didn't see "Heat" when it came out. I read all the gushing critical reviews, but I just never got around to it.
Watching it 24 years after its release, it struck me as contrived and cliched, with dialogue that sounds like something out of a bad 1940's gangster movie ("The cops are all over me like a cheap suit." One guy actually says this! And there many other cringe-worthy lines).
The cops and crooks are all alpha males; the women are all brainless bimbos--especially DeNiro's girlfriend who, in spite of being a normal "civilian," decides to stick with him even after she discovers that's he's a thief and a murderer. This is after about two dates. Good choice, lady.
To make matters worse, the movie is interminable: two hours and 49 minutes.
There's plenty of automatic weapons fire, scores of wrecked vehicles, and many gallons of blood, if you like that kind of thing.
Everyone at the time of the film's release was all hyped to see DeNiro and Pacino together as a bad guy and a cop, but to me, there is no chemistry. The one scene in which they meet in a restaurant and talk is promising, but it falls flat. They recite their lines and try to make it convincing, but that particular moment in the film made me realize how little investment they had in these roles. Just two big time actors collecting their paychecks.
Just another Hollywood blockbuster with pretensions of greatness. Meh. It passes the time, nearly three very long hours of it.