It's No Kung Fury

Rating: 8/10 (30 June 2017)

In 2015 a new cinematic age began. In that year, the movie "Kung Fury" appeared in a world that had been ready for its release for many, many centuries.
But some things take time. Now, at last, we have entered the "Post Kung Fury" age and all smart-aleck behavior, from here on out, shall be judged on how well it stacks up when compared to the great touchstone film itself--Kung Fury.
Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 is a fine piece of movie-making. It contains all the wonderful things from the first movie, and it succeeds in not boring us with a pointless recap when we could always just go to IMDb and read the synopsis. But we're living two years AFTER Kung Fury. AFTER. You can't just press-on like it was 2014.
Kung Fury marked the dawn of a new age. There was smart-aleckry PRIOR to Kung Fury, and smark-aleckry AFTER. We are living in the Year 2 A.K. (two years after Kung Fury) so a lot of the humor here, which would have been knee-slappin' good three years ago, is now just starting to grow a bit...stale.
Guardians of the Galaxy, Vol. 2 is like your uncle who desperately tries to be hip, and works very hard at it, but is always six months behind. GOTG Vol. 2 is often embarrassing because you know they are working so darned hard, and it's so sad to see how far they are from the new normal. Every time some "clever" thing was said, I kept hearing the words "That would explain the laser raptors" in my head.
Yeah. Sure it was funny, Uncle Pete. (Just not that funny). You try and you try to make a big, tent-pole movie about monsters and fathers and raccoons and then you work your fingers to the bone for you kids and what do you get? I'm tired of trying to please you. Next time, you can make YOUR OWN hyper-expensive super-ironic superhero movie.
Oh. That would explain the dinosaurs.