Predictably awful

Rating: 1/10 (25 November 2014)

Mindless entertainment usually has some charm to it if nothing else, Guardians delivers none of that. Throughout the whole film it provided maybe two sincerely funny moments while the rest of it came across mostly as unintentional comedy thanks to a gibberish script. I've never laughed at someone dying of cancer before but the prologue of Guardians is just so hilariously god-awful it had me in stitches all through the opening credits.
Oh Christ, what a forgettable, uninteresting and pitifully bland mess of a film this was. I suppose it appeals to easily impressionable simpletons but I struggle to see how, there's hardly any character development, the plot is nonsense from start to finish, the antagonist is some bland and boring caricature who seemingly only exists as a vehicle to introduce Thanos (who is a big deal I'm assuming?) and it's all just so damn predictable. Perhaps worst of all the ending is just another anticlimactic retread of the old and tired "power of love" trope.
I may have given Guardians at least one point if it had decent effects and camera work put into it, but none of that is to be found here.