Oof -- That was bad.

Rating: 1/10 (27 February 2017)

LOL! An 8.1 rating at IMDb! It surely seems that the movie studios are automating the stock/robotic positive reviews that overtake this site for each new big budget failure. Come to think of it...I haven't had to fill out a CAPTCHA lately...hmm
Anyhow, I made it about 45 minutes in before cutting my losses.
Zoe Saldana basically plays the same uninspiring role in every movie she's in...here she's green, there she's blue. Chris Pratt's character seems like it came from the cutting room floor of an American Pie movie admixed with a touch of the Rocketeer. Pratt and Saldana have no chemistry together. The CGI cybernetic, jokester raccoon with the voice of Bradley Cooper is also among the worst characters ever conceived for a movie.
The plot was meh at best and the whole production was dragged down by one of the worst screenplays ever put together. I mean it was really awful. Chock full of "jokes" and one-liners that just weren't funny. Not even smirk-worthy funny, let alone laughter-inducing. The dialog was artificial and embarrassing for whoever penned it. It was bad and s/he should feel bad for it. This movie tried way too hard to be Star Wars meets the Avengers and it wasn't successful at it.
Also featured was too much exposition about what Ronin or Thanos had done or were trying to do; "you're Draxx the Destroyer!" type telling rather than showing. None of the characters were introduced in a logical or organic way; they mostly seemed shoehorned in.
I think it says a lot about the acting when a CGI tree (hint: wooden) is the best of the bunch.
Yes, you are Groot. And I will not be watching anything connected with Guardians of the Galaxy again.