Long live the drive-in movie.

Rating: 7/10 (9 April 2007)

Robert Rodriguez and Quentin Tarantino have teamed up once again to make Grindhouse, as close to the drive-in going experience that you can have in a theater. The results are mixed. First we get a phony preview for a movie called "Machete". It's a hilarious take on the 70's revenge/action movie. Our first is movie, "Planet Terror", directed by Robert Rodriguez. It's primarily the story of a stripper named Cherry Darling, and her fight to stay alive in the face of a horde of zombies. Cherry is played by Rose McGowan, and for this genre, it's a star making role. Cherry quits the stripper life, and sets off to realize her dream of becoming a stand-up comedian. She runs into her old boyfriend, El Ray, played by Freddy Rodriguez. Cherry and El Ray meet up at run down diner, and pick up their bickering where they left off. But the undead are loose in town, and their numbers are growing. This is where we get into classic zombie movie territory, as we meet individual survivors, who will all eventually meet up at the same place, and fight for their lives.Lurking in the background somewhere is Bruce Willis as the leader of a military unit that knows far more than they are revealing about the zombie outbreak. It's a complete throwback to the campy horror movies of the 70's, complete with a scratchy film print, dodgy audio, and even a missing real that causes the story to jump hours ahead. Of course the most recognized image from the movie is Rose McGowans machine gun for a leg. It's ridiculous and I loved it. This is a fun zombie flick that ranks right up there with the best of them. Let us not forget the gore. We have running gun battles, knifings, impalings, smashings, and of course, severed limbs flying everywhere. If the movie ended here, I'd feel I got my money's worth. However it doesn't, and it's all downhill from here. After "Planet Terror" ends we are shown three more previews for movies that don't exist. "Werewolf Women Of The S.S." is dumb, and the low point of the movie. Only slightly better is "Don't", a take on haunted house movies. Finally there's "Thanksgiving" a rip on holiday themed slasher movies. After that preview, we begin the second feature, Quentin Tarantino's "Death Proof". I'm sorry to say that, for the most part, it's a snoozer. It begins as the story of four very bitchy and uninteresting women setting out for a girl's night out. The cruise, drink, do drugs, and party at a local bar, while engaging in various man bashing conversations. All of this is done under the watchful eye of a mysterious stranger known as Stuntman Mike. Mike is played by Kurt "The MAN" Russell, and he owns every second that he is on the screen. Unfortunately, he's not up there long enough. Even though he is billed as the star of the movie, he's in the whole thing for MAYBE thirty minutes. In this story he gets acquainted with the girls, and sees if they are the caliber of women they think they are. They are not, Mike decides, and therefore they must be punished. To do this, he uses a specially reinforced Hollywood stunt car that he claims is "death proof". In one instant he uses this car to rid the world (and the audience) of this group of air headed women. From here, the story begins again with a NEW group of women, only slightly more interesting than the first group. These women are stunt women themselves, and they aren't the dope fiends that the first group of girls were, but they never shut their mouths. This group includes Rosario Dawson, Zoe (a real life stunt woman, playing herself), and the insanely cute Mary Elizabeth Winsted. Our group of ladies is looking for a rush, and they decide to get it by Zoe strapping herself to the hood of a 1970 Dodge Challenger, as the other ladies sit inside, pushing the car to speeds close to 200 mph. It's here that Mike re-enters the movie, and decides to up the ante on this joyride. He smashes into the car with Zoe still on the hood. It's here that the movie gives us it's money shot. Zoe clings, face first to the roof of the car, and we get a camera shot from behind her, getting a full view of the road as it whizzes under her. Things do not go Mike's way, as the ladies manage to turn the chase on him. It's an incredibly exciting chase scene.The problem is that it takes WAY too long to get there.Mike's attack on the first group of women is hardcore and brutal. It also lasts for about 10 seconds on film. We're shown the crash four times, so we can see (in detail) how every girl meets her fate. We then get another hour of the next group of women sitting around talking, before we get back into the action. Tarantino is famous for his dialog sequences. His characters always have something off the wall to say, and they say it using the most colorful words they can. But unlike "Death Proof", the conversations were usually something the audience could identify with. Here, what we get are two groups of women, that obviously don't like men at all, and they need to tell us that...over and over and over again. So for the price of admission we get one kick ass zombie movie, and so-so revenge/thriller/action movie with an incredibly boring set up, an amazing finale, and Kurt Russell at his coolest since Snake Plissken. Too bad he couldn't completely save the movie.