Trite, Laughable, Embarrassing

Rating: 1/10 (22 October 2005)

Shockingly bad, unrealistic turd of a movie. Where does one start? Poor characterization, risible plot, dreadful performances, the list goes on, ad's infinitum et nauseam. A story that lacked nuance, drama, wit, tension. How can a film about violence lack tension? Amazing. It beggars belief that anyone put money into the project on the back of the script. Elijah Wood, you are charged with enabling, aiding and abetting a floater of a film to see the light of day. I'm afraid your only plea can be 'guilty m'lud'.
Speaking of Frodo, well... I have to say I almost felt sorry for the lad. He had the look of a rabbit caught in the headlights, an actor at sea in a ship adrift. How often he must have wished he could walk the plank. Did this film have a director? Poorly shot, poorly framed... just plain poor.
I will not dignify this movie with anymore remarks.