Sewage

Rating: Null/10 (1 February 2007)

Phoney-baloney movie critics like me know very well that our opinions are usually only important when we torque someone off.
Prepare yourself--I'm about to feel important.
Grease is a fecal remnant of a movie, a messy, unfunny, glob of excrement masquerading as nostalgia, love story, and musical. For all the reasons the great horde of Grease-lovers love it, I find it revolting. It's pop-culture without the fizz, a high-concept, sanitized inanity based on a rough and raunchy Broadway play.
I remember sitting there in the theatre, grimacing and squirming as if a movie had somehow morphed into a hemorrhoid. To add to my discomfort was my idiot sister, sitting beside me and idiot-grinning as if Jesus himself had donned a Fonzie outfit and had begun warbling with Olivia Newton-Magdelene.
There is simply nothing I can say about this effluvia other than . . .
Grease is the turd.