In a word: meh.

Rating: 3/10 (20 October 2013)

In a word: meh.
In several more words:
Stunningly lazy plot development, one dimensional dialogue and face value philosophical allusions set against its one saving grace: simply magnificent cinematography. Much like the Mona Lisa with a crayon beard, it's a glaring juxtaposition that makes for one obnoxiously aggravating viewing experience. A film I might watch again in the theater, but next time I'm bringing a set of earplugs.
*spoilers ahead*
So here's how it goes down: Opening scene, spacewalk. Bullock is performing some interesting looking work on the Hubble, which they never bother to explain. Clooney is floating around wasting his thruster pack fuel for no reason and a third astronaut is bouncing around also detracting from the mission. Then all of a sudden Russia destroys one of its own satellites with a missile, NASA tells Bullock & Clooney everything is fine, nothing to worry about. Then, literally three minutes later they recontact saying the destroyed satellite has caused a "chain reaction" of destruction and the debris is now minutes away and heading right towards the shuttle! Abort Mission! What?!?? That's ridiculous.
Gravity? A reference both to the characteristics of motion in an orbital environment and the weighty nature of the situation these two find themselves in. Pretty deep, but I think a more apt title would be "George Clooney and Sandra Bullock's Wacky Outer Space Adventure - starring George Clooney and Sandra Bullock as themselves." Both are unconvincing as professional astronauts, plot revelations are thrown into the film with no attempt at subtlety or reality. For example, need to establish where Sandra Bullock is from? Why not have George Clooney just ask her, like an hour into the film, where she "pitches her tent"? How about her personal life? Have him ask if there's a Mr. so-and-so! I'll tell you why not: two astronauts, who would have no doubt spent a very long time training together on Earth and then be crammed together in the space shuttle with literally no privacy would have broached these water cooler icebreaker topics in their first hour together. The interpersonal dialogue throughout has all the depth of two people that just met on a bus. Ugh.
From that point on this film couldn't have been more formulaic if it had been produced for a Disneyland motion ride with a C3PO narrator. Set your watch folks, in seven minutes there will be another improbable action sequence followed by more of Sandra Bullock's lame emotional odyssey followed by another explosion.
Some have been commenting on the recurring theme of spiritual rebirth peppering the film. Again, just thrown together without any attempt at subtlety. Sandra Bullock curls up into an ultrasound perfect fetal position complete with an oxygen tether umbilical cord floating cast against a suspiciously uterine-looking airlock through which she was just birthed into a second chance at life? Give me a break. Or how about the scene where she was resigning herself to death in the Soyuz and the last transmission she receives is from a foreign ham radio operator with a crying baby in the background? And what's worse they couldn't even leave it at that, she has to say (and I'm paraphrasing here) "Oh! A baby, neat-o! I'm dying and someone else is being born, life goes on ob-la-di ob-la-da!" Alright, she didn't say that, but she was thinking it.
The only scene that caught me by surprise was Clooney's reappearance at the capsule window near the end. The obvious was to make it an oxygen deprived delusion, but given the preceding 75 minutes I gave it a 50/50 chance that the writer would actually have him just miraculously re-appear with no explanation. Well, credit where credit is due and I doff my hat to the writer for having not done that at least.
And now for the insensitive and inappropriately aggressive commentary befitting an online amateur review: You know how after watching Apollo 13 you walked away thinking "man, if I'm ever in trouble in space I sure hope Tom Hanks is around." We'd all prefer Jim Lovell of course, but Tom Hanks the actor would do in a pinch. Well, after seeing this film, if I ever find myself in trouble in space with George Clooney and Sandra Bullock my first instinct will be to smother both of them to save oxygen.