Absurd characters and plot sink this poor man's 'Fatal Attraction'

Rating: 3/10 (19 October 2014)

'Gone Girl' is one of those films in which I have no guilt feelings whatsoever in giving away the plot. If you must see it, wait until cable or when it comes to Netflix. The first third however, actually isn't that bad. Ben Affleck plays Nick Dunne whose wife, Amy, lived a sheltered and privileged existence after her parents created a series of children's novels entitled 'Amazing Amy', based on her life as a child in NYC.
We learn in a series of flashbacks from Amy's journal, that when she first met Nick, it was similar to a perfect, whirlwind romance. Eventually, however, the couple is forced to move back to Missouri, to take care of Nick's mother, who has cancer. Amy is forced to give back a substantial sum of money to her parents who basically bankrolled her career, when they go into debt. Amy pours the remaining money into a bar, which is run by Nick and his sister.
One fine day Amy disappears and the investigating detective, finds a series of clues purposely left there by Amy (including her journal). Soon, Nick fast becomes the prime suspect in Amy's disappearance. Nick tries to keep himself together, despite the media circus right outside his door. Eventually we learn in a twist, that Amy is a psychopath who seeks to humiliate Nick. This basically is where I lost interest in the film. Amy is too much of a bizarre character to be taken seriously. Her main motivation for wanting to do her husband in, is that he cheated on her. The way in which she tries to frame him, seems too complicated to pull off in real life; one also wonders if she was so enraged at him, why doesn't she simply try and kill him by making his death seem like an accident?
The plot becomes even more bizarre when Amy allows herself to be ripped off by two rednecks who learn that she has a lot of cash on her, while they're all staying at a motel. For a clever psychopath like Amy, it seems a little too easy for her to be ripped off so easily by the two low life's she encounters. Now penniless, she contacts Desi Collings (Neil Patrick Harris) who stalked her in high school. Now rich, the one-note Desi believes this is his chance to help Amy, while attempting to woo her again. Desi comes off as an equally unbelievable character as Amy, since there is no reason why he should have remained obsessed with her for all this time (not to mention the restraining order that Amy took out against him years ago). Amy ends up murdering Desi (in a very gruesome and unpleasant scene), slashing his throat with a box cutter. Before doing so, however she pretends she's been raped by Desi in front of a surveillance camera..
The last third of the film features the last and equally noxious twist. Nick ends up 'lawyering up' by hiring the big media attorney, Tanner Bolt, who encourages him to be interviewed on a Nancy Grace-like show. By owning up to having an affair, Nick improves his media image after his girlfriend came forward to reveal their affair. Suddenly, Amy decides to nix the original plan to frame Nick and returns home, much to everyone's shock across the country, who have been following the case incessantly for the past few months on TV and social media.
Somehow, Amy gets a hold of Nick's sperm in a sperm bank and impregnates herself. Much to his sister's chagrin, Nick decides to stay with psycho Amy, and raise the baby together.
'Gone Girl' for me is a poor man's 'Fatal Attraction'. Somehow, Rosamund Pike's 'Amy' doesn't compare to the much more chilling, 'Alex', excellently played by Glenn Close in Fatal Attraction. Here Amy is practically a comic character, who gets away with both an attempted frame-up and murder, and ends up humiliating her poor schlub of a husband, who is forced to go back to her, under duress.
'Gone Girl' is not to be taken seriously and those who admire the absurd characters and plot, to my mind, have low standards indeed.