True Story; Film Students Kidnapped The Real Movie Makers

Rating: 2/10 (9 September 2014)

A group of UCLA film students were smoking dope in Westwood, and created the most daring plan in the history of cinema. Why not kidnap all the talented people associated with Godzilla 2014 and make their own movie? Far out, Dude.
To avoid spoilers, I won't divulge the boring details of the kidnapping of talented directors, writers, special effects artists and actors originally hired. All the stoney students were BIG fans of Breaking Bad, so the only original cast member was Bryan Cranston. He quickly began asking too many hard questions, so they killed off his character after only 20 minutes into the movie, paid him his millions, smoked another 20 bowls and continued on.
They worked hard into each night, fueled by drugs, pizza and caffeinated soft drinks. Like all stoners, good ideas came and went, unrealized. They tried real hard, but their drug fueled fuzzy thinking permeates each and every scene. The premises sounded good, and the THC influenced authors were certain everyone would get it.
They began running out of money (several million was spent on Domino's alone) so they hired children to fill out the scenes. They worked cheap. Eventually, they ran out of pot, pizza and capital, so they threw together a dumb ending and finished.
The real filmmakers were released, their budget spent, their original ideas gone and the substitute film in the can. They decided not to go public, since the product was watchable and probably makes sense to stoned 12 year olds.
This movie is not "so bad it's good." It's so bad that it's....so bad. It's more fun to rewatch the one made in the 50s.
Now the true story of Godzilla 2014 can be told.