Ferris Bueller finds time machine, ends up in Civil War

Rating: 4/10 (27 July 2009)

This movie is awful. The fact that it's in the top 250 is laughable.
The head-explosion in the beginning was pretty decent. The characters were pretty forced and unbelievable. The Dread Pirate Roberts guy is a decent actor. Ferris Bueller wasn't.
The fake mustache was hilarious. I was confused for awhile and thought he was wearing a disguise or something. I thought there was some secret plot where he was a 17 year old kid who took the identity of some Civil War colonel. Nope, they really did try to pass off the look.
Morgan Freeman was the only person who made this movie watchable. He's cool, like ice cold for the first two hours. Then there's this weird prayer session around a campfire where he turns into a raging lunatic. Someone must've snuck some crack into his collard-greens or something. (Not a racist joke, this is what they were rationed back then) Denzel Washington plays the same character he plays in every movie. "Y'all are racist! Kill whitey!" The battle scenes were pretty archaic and funny, though that is a fair depiction of what old-world-European-style-warfare is. Walk up to each other in horizontal lines and fire your weapons. The looks on the confederate's faces when they saw a wave of eyes and teeth coming at them in the night was pretty hilarious.
I'm no racist. I would've fought and died along the sides of these guys back in the Civil War. This story deserves a better movie. I'm extremely disappointed every time there's a movie about something important that misses the mark.
But yeah, the head exploding in the beginning was awesome and funny. Better than Scanners in my opinion.