As the Crowe Flies

Rating: Null/10 (2 June 2000)

Okay, I haven't seen a gladiator movie in a long time, but, I thought they were all rather simplistic. Sword and sandals epics, they're called. Togas and tigers. Chariots and fire. Arenas and amphitheaters. Columns and colosseums. The new movie, Gladiator, is chance to see all that stuff. That was about what I expected. Not a day at the beach.
You have to remember the genre. The filming expenses became greater than the box office totals, so, they haven't made this kind of movie in almost 40 years. The subject matter is violence. Got that? A gladiator fights to the death. Therefore, the main course here is bloody, hand-to-hand combat, served with war, duty, ambition, murder, injustice, betrayal, and revenge, with small side orders of politics and philosophy. And for dessert, more blood and death. A friendly word of advice? Don't sit in the first two rows. By today's standards, it has to come out different than what's been done before. It comes out dark, somber, dour, gloomy, and computer-generated. Yeah, I really miss those light-hearted films about ancient Romans and barbarians, too, but what do you think it was really like? I know I wouldn't want to live back then. Neither would Kirk Douglas, Charleton Heston, nor the late Victor Mature, nor the late Steve Reeves, I'm guessing.
This movie is getting mixed reviews. I suppose it could have been better in some ways, but that really depends on what you're looking for. It's a tragedy, not `the feel good movie of the summer.' Do some people just not get that? This may be the reason for the conflicting opinions. It doesn't matter if you know the story ahead of time. Just don't expect to be uplifted and spiritually renewed. All I expected was good acting and some entertainment value. I spent $4.50 at a 1:30 p.m. matinee, and can say I was entertained at times, and certainly didn't feel it was a waste of time and money. Not at all. The ones who get short-changed are women. Their roles in these kinds of movies are nearly always dumb. No exception here.
Russell Crowe is always good. He is the movie. If I didn't know any better, I could have sworn that at times he sounded exactly like Mel Gibson, especially in a rare split second when a line of dialogue was delivered with his back is to the camera. Must be the Aussie influence. His committment to his work, both physically and mentally, is amazing to watch. We have far too few, and can never have too many actors like that. Somebody said they'd pay money to watch him stand around and drink beer. What greater compliment is there?
Somebody has to play the bad guy. Joaquin Phoenix has the perfect look for the part, and seems committed, but ends up looking like he's in over his head. Okay, he got this acting job to do a movie with none other than Crowe, Oliver Reed and Richard Harris. That might be a bit intimidating, no? It would be hard for most of us not to look like we suck sharing the screen with those guys. It's a part for a young Roddy McDowall type, and Phoenix did provided the insipid total psychopath needed, but nobody in this movie was even allowed to have any fun.
The late Oliver Reed's farewell performance was excellent. I loved him in the Musketeers movies of the 70's, and was glad to see him working until the end. That's one way to go, isn't it?
I thought the special effects were rather seamless, though some of the landscapes do look like gorgeous computer paintings. Though no doubt it makes Rome look better than it was, I thought it strange that I never saw an aqueduct, nor any sunshine. I couldn't tell that England wasn't Germania, and Malta, where a lot of this was shot, is really one awesome-looking place. As far as the action, I noticed from the first battle scene that they had so many fast cuts and too-close close-ups, and so much shaky camera crap that it was mission impossible to actually follow what was happening physical-action-wise from moment to moment. That bothered me, but I doubt they wanted to be too graphic too soon, and figured they first wanted to give a basic feel for the violence, rather than glory in the bloody details. Maybe it was a ratings thing, too. It wasn't quite as guarded later on, though still sometimes challenging to watch.
This a must-see, even if it's just to make up your own mind about the highest-grossing movie of its opening weekend. You can decide for yourself. That's the main thing. e-mail and comments welcome.