Oh dear oh dear oh dear...

Rating: Null/10 (2 January 2001)

Hmm. Gladiator. A tough one, that's for sure.. I'm not exactly sure whether I like it. Sure, I liked it the first time I saw it on airplane to Barbados, but I couldn't really see the picture on the miniscule screen and I was under the impression that the role of Commodus was played by Scottish guy Dougray Scott, partly because of the lighting and partly out of hope that no director in their right mind would cast someone like Joaquin (or Wokeen, I've heard it pronounced) Phoenix in such a necessary role. Anyway, after nine (or a million) times of sitting through this movie I am not exactly impressed much anymore. The scripting is bad, the effects are bad, the actors are worst. I was surprised that more wooden actors like Keanu Reeves and Leo DiCaprio weren't thrown in to make it just that little bit more tedious. The suuposed tension between emperor Commodus and his passive sis Lucilla, played by the miserable Connie Nielsen is drowned out by the increasingly annoying soundtrack and the gratuitous gore factor that spatters the entire set. Russell Crow couldn't get an Oscar if he bribed the panel. Old Wokeen, or let's call him Wok, ruined the cast, with apparently not much effort at all. And we all know that Oliver Reed stole the show anyway so don't argue, OK?! Let's face it. You like it? I think you just hit Wok bottom.