Scorsese remakes "Fight Club" -- already?

Rating: 5/10 (20 December 2002)

Is there a difference between Leonardo DiCaprio and Brad Pitt? Not that I could see. Everyone seems to sweat a lot, all the time. Where are they exactly? Surely it's a mythical New York City. No one seems to have a home. No one ever sits down at a table to eat. Nearly every scene looks like it's set in a local whore house, one for immigrant Irish, another for Chinese. And in this toxic never-never land, even if you're shot through the chest like Billy the Butcher (Day-Lewis), you can still enjoy two bare-breasted babes without having the doc tend to your wound. And the noise is relentless -- the ha-has, the boasting, the threats, the punches, the sweat -- it's all a relentless, mean -- and corny -- brouhaha.
I can't give any spoilers here, because I didn't stay to see how it all turned out. I gave Scorsese the benefit of two hours, but by then he still hadn't pulled his film out of the muck. Sorry, Martin, I tried.