Formula - Check!

Rating: 2/10 (22 October 2015)

I call it profit pandering when all that the producers ask of the writer and director is to make sure there are as many formula scenes (movie history has proved these to be money makers) as possible to attract the widest audience. Check out the proof: 1. Prolonged close up shots of the rear ends (said this way to bypass Amazon censors) of bikini, barely clad, humans. Check! 2. Prolonged close up shots of the males who compensate for their small appendage (said this way to bypass Amazon censors) by over pumping (exaggerating) the male antlers (i.e. muscle). A skill acquired first by practice posturing in front of their full length mirrors. Males further enhance their displays by seeming to always be wearing tight tees (if at all) with small sleeves to promote those antlers. So much non- functional muscle that if they tried running they might outrun a sloth. Check! 3. Furthering this theme is the storyline of "muscle" cars accompanied by prolonged close ups of "pushing the pedal to the metal" and massaging the manual shift with the that standard coup de grâce - squealing tires. Oh, and the car drop from airplane - done before. Check! 4. Assault on bad guy fortress - done so many times in film it has actually become boring. Fight scenes - an Oscar for camera angles. Bruce Lee, if he could see this, would be laughing in his Lake View home. Check! 5. Dialogue? Written for that part of the audience that struggled to pass sophomore English in high school. Check! 6. Inject into the storyline the latest pop news headlines caption grabber - terrorists and hackers. Check!