Let It Blow...

Rating: 1/10 (10 February 2017)

Aside from being able to tell the ending of the film just by seeing the poster (the sisters side-by-side), I knew it was another animated musical from Disney (because the featured "Let It Go" song just didn't stop playing everywhere), so I had my expectations as low as could be when I watched it... And even so, it managed to be even worse than I was prepared it to be.
The main character is Elsa, who should be based on Andersen's Snow Queen, but turns out to be more like one of Marvel's X-Men with godly powers. She can create matter by will out of nowhere, i.e., she produces ice without needing water, so she could pretty much destroy the whole universe by stacking up ice until the gravity would exceed that of the original singularity! Not enough? Of course not, she can also create LIFE, and not just any life, conscious and persistent lifeforms (remember, the snowman is THE SAME snowman every winter, so its consciousness obviously is able to exist throughout eternity, so even if it is not indestructible, as it can be melted down, its mind still stands and, given enough time, it would eventually return, the feat of a demigod, at least). Granted, the creatures are not the brightest LED lamps on the market, but, come on, she's just beginning to test her powers. More over, her powers are unlimited, she can cool down things without spending energy, i.e., she can revert entropy, she could "reboot" the universe itself! Very few characters in the scope of Marvel, DC or any other comic book publisher has been created so powerful... And despite all that powers, she's unable to handle a bunch of invading soldiers, in her castle, armed with pikes and swords?! Sure...
The X-Woman has a sister, "Easy Anna", who has the superpower of being extra "easy", unlike her "no one was getting anywhere with her" sibling (yeah, stated literally like that on film). She can fall in love at first sight with any man crossing her way. Be careful, because she also sings, cheesy and badly, like she's in a cabaret, or worse. "For The First Time in Forever" is an irking ode to adolescence's boiling hormones. Of course, she eventually manages to fall in love with a misogynous prince and kind of gets herself cursed (it seems the X-Elsa is also able to cast icy curses, even unwillingly, what is maybe the closest to Andersen's original plot that they managed to get).
The rest is a wild ride of plot holes. For example, Elsa comes full fledged with Advanced Mathematics knowledge, being able not only to raise up a castle of pure ice (cf. Superman's Solitude Fortress), but to sing about "frozen fractals", all around. Even so, her people seem to be unable to build a wooden snow sledge that doesn't EXPLODE in the event of falling a few metres down a cliff... I mean, it was made of WOOD and blew up like it was carrying Napalm (what maybe it was, we don't actually know anything about Kristoff, he could be on Interpol's wanted list!)
Talking about nonsense, why the ice started growing INSIDE the castle, chasing Easy Anna out, but stopped doing so outside, where it was surely much colder? If it was part of the curse, that was a very specific instalment. I mean, the ice shall grow around to kill her, but only in case she's in a castle...? Maybe it was just coincidence, the whole castle could be freezing, because the whole world was cooling down, but then again, it really looked colder outside than inside and I couldn't see much ice growing where Easy Anna was not, in that castle... Does any of that make any sense, at all...?
And what was that about the sisters' childhood? So, one sister hurts the other while playing, so their parents take them apart, and erase one's memories?! Damn, why didn't I think of that when MY daughters hurt each other?! I mean, sure, it was an accident, but I could raise them apart, just to make sure they would never hurt themselves again. It's easier than trying to teach them to be nice and better persons. Makes sense, totally... What doesn't make sense is why Easy Anna didn't refreeze when she found out about her erased memories, if that was part of the treat (or "treatment") the trolls used on her... I think they just got "trolled"!
All in all, this show is a bad example in parenting and how logic doesn't fit in a Disney film. It's also a moral lesson on the dangers of young women being "too cold" or "too easy"... Could it get any more sexist than that? Big hit by Disney, two princesses in one film. The only up side on it is "Let It Go", because it's likely the most exploitable song, ever! Let it blow, let it blow, like a sledge down the sno-oh-ow...