"Sleepy Hollow"-Syndrome

Rating: 4/10 (27 April 2002)

I had serious problems trying to enjoy this movie as it obviously suffers from "Sleepy Hollow Syndrome" (SHS). I'll try to explain what I mean: The most important fact that made me dislike this Hollywood production was the more than clumsily written script.... simply put: it was LAME. Throughout the whole 2 hours I did not give a damn about what would happen to the characters or who the killer really was. Just as in "SH", none of the characters were able to draw the viewer's attention for more than 5 minutes. And, also a trademark of the SHS, the ending was completely unsatisfying since it made the impression as if it were hastily put together only to reveal that the murderer ***SPOILER*** was someone that you didn't give s***t about at all. ***end of SPOILER*** Well, I would still prefer SH over this bore of a movie any day. I haven't read any of the graphic novels this film is supposedly based on but if the storyline therein is as dull as what the viewer is offered here, then I doubt it would have ever been adapted for the silver screen. The plot has many holes that were seemingly just put in there to make the whole thing longer (115 minutes!!! there was enough plot for about 60).
***SPOILERS AHEAD*** Why is this whole drug-addiction-vision thing so important anyway?!! It doesn't add to the suspense and the sequences aren't even interesting to watch when you're ON drugs.... I think that says a lot. What meaning or possible plot relevancy is there behind the odd lesbian relationship between some of the whores?!? I DID NOT GET IT! If anyone did, then please take the time to explain it to me!! I'd really appreciate it: ;) Why Oh Why did it have to end like this?!!! It's the ending that I had been expecting since the first 30 minutes or so!!! I knew who he was all along!!! That's not what a thriller is supposed to be like! I DO NOT WANT TO KNOW WHO JTR WAS!!!! At least it shouldn't be someone like the killer portrayed in "From Hell".
Well what else is there to say? The pathetic acting (with the cheesiest part delivered by good ol' Heather G.) was not helped by the poor accents.... and usually I'm very generous when it comes to accents. The whole drama thing was about as involving as an episode of "Denver Clan" and Johnny D. couldn't convince me that he really wanted to make a good movie. I like many of Johnny Depp's works (especially Dead Man and Fear And Loathing... ;-) ) but I believe that he should've just skipped this one (and a few others, mind you).
Ok, so to sum it up: DO NOT WATCH THIS MOVIE! It may have some (very little) gore but it's not enough to keep slasher-fans interested. There's no historical correctness either, so anyone interested in the Jack the Ripper story will be very disappointed as well. And there isn't enough original plot, almost no good acting and only fairly impressive camerawork.... so it won't be a treat for any of you moviemaniacs out there either. Don't say I didn't warn you!
The Elephant Man?!?! .... for what reason I ask!!!!