Sweet Bloody Kisses..xx

Rating: 10/10 (2 March 2003)

I absolutely love this film, every time it comes on T.V. It never tires me, it's always a joy to watch.
This is a Vampire movie with an attitude, and humorous dialogue. George Clooney is not my favorite actor, but his performance is good in this one. Robert Roderiguez of the SPYkids movies directs this Horror Adventure.
Seth Gecko (Clooney), and Richard Gecko (Tarantino) play Two Murderous Criminal Brothers on the run from the law, and their only chance of escape is moving to Mexico (a place that is now full of wanted people in the Movie world). To devise a quick route to their destination, they take hostages, a Trailer-travelling Family- Jacob Fuller (Keitel)as a preacher who lost his faith, his Son Scott Fuller (Liu), and his Daughter Kate (Lewis).
The delusional Richard takes an obsessive interest in Kate and this distracts him from his duties. By luck they reach the Mexican border and force the Fuller family to go into a Strip bar called the TITTY TWISTER for a meeting of a crime boss.
Santanico Pandemonium played by the sexy Salma Hayek (who is now playing Frida) does a belly dance and shows off her curves, I don't fancy girls, but somehow Salma doing that serpent dance made me twist my sexuality for 2 minutes. That is the most seductive scene in movie history, or of my History!!! And I don't mind watching it all over again.....and again.
It's not long before the Gecko Brothers got themselves into trouble, as a result Richard's hand was shot and bloody, turning frenzied Salma into a lizard-like blood Sucker and attacked and bitten Richard, who becomes a vampire; Seth had to end his brother's life.
Seth is angered and retailiates, by begging the survivors including the Fullers to fight for their lives, and the blood bath begins.
They are fantastic one-lines coming from the Actors that flow more than the River Nile, for example Vampire Musicians were on stage, Sex machine (Savini) said to Frost (Williamson) 'let's kill that F****** Band' and the blood Sucking singer sticks a finger gesture 'F*** you and Good Night' *Kaboom* the band blows up. Kietel becomes a Preacher with attitude using a Crucifix-style Gun. Salma tells Seth that he will be her slave and pet dog, Seth replies with a gun 'No Thanks, I already had a Wife'. and the ending is bloody good. Pure Classic.