The sex scenes are not worth it

Rating: 4/10 (1 May 2015)

So I just saw Fifty Shades of Grey in theaters by myself How has it come to this?
I believe that for this review, a bit of back story is in order. One day, while waiting for my plane at an airport in Dallas, I stumbled upon the much talked about erotic novel. I had some money to spare and bought it out of pure boredom. I sat down and read it for the next few days, and I kinda liked it. Fifty Shades is what I'd called an "easy read." Not a piece of literature to be examined or talked about. Just a nice piece of smut to pass the time while you're forced to read Hamlet in English class. I was actually kind of rooting for this film in a way, as a I felt that people were taking it too seriously as a film. It's simple porn, what's there to criticize?
However, as the reviews came in, the sirens went off in my head. With criticisms directed towards the acting and the characters and the writing, my expectation were hit. So I bought my ticket and just said to myself, "Hey, if I'm not expecting much, then the film won't suck."
So, I sat down in a theater with a bunch of chatty young women and all of the boyfriends wanted to kill themselves, and the movie started.
Well I didn't HATE it.
So the major problem that I have with Fifty Shades of Grey is that it is boring. The scenes between the two main characters where they're just talking and interacting is just not interesting. You sit there waiting for the LEGENDARY sex scenes to come on, and even those aren't enough to carry the film! I know the BDSM scenes are shocking and new to most people, but the truth is, I'm not most people. And apparently, I wasn't alone because the guy sitting right next to me was just as bored as I was. I swear, we both yawned at the exact same time!
The directing doesn't stand out at all. The shots and angles were pretty stationary and standard, nothing exciting or new or interesting. I did like one shot were Christian was sitting at a piano as the Seattle skyline shined in the night.
Along with that, the acting was sub-par AT BEST. Nobody stands out. The whole time, I was just thinking, "this actor is delivering their lines."
The character of Anastasia Steele can only be described as a pushover.And other than that, she's also can be pretty indecisive. I mean, she spends the whole movie complaining about how Christian doesn't treat her like a normal girlfriend (even though he does) and how this BDSM business is too much for her (even though the film shows she clearly likes.)
Christian Grey is NOT an interesting character. He's merely a prop for female readers to grab on to. The purpose of him having a dark and lonely past, coupled by him being changed by Anastasia, is merely a female fantasy of taking a bad boy and trying to help him see "love." It's no brainer to me know how this evolved from Twilight fanfiction.
But yeah, with all of that said, Fifty Shades of Grey is simply a boring romance film with a minuscule glimmer into the world of BDSM. But when you see that speck of a new world in sex and fetishes, it's really not much to write home about.