Terrible

Rating: Null/10 (17 March 2015)

Really terrible. Don't waste your money. I'm required to give a more in-depth review, though I feel as if I've already said everything that I can. So here goes...
First: the acting. It's insulting. Dornan's attempt at seductive comes across as just creepy. Reminded me of Hannibal Lecter's introduction in The Silence of the Lambs. Johnson's turn fares slightly better. She's at least believable. The supporting cast turn in polished, but ultimately negligible, performances. Their forgettable characters just flit in and out of scenes, punctuating the viewer's boredom with merely a variety of things with which to be bored.
That being said, the writing is probably to blame for the performances. The cast can hardly help what's on the page. It feels as though the studio randomly selected somebody off the street, gave them a basic outline, and a weekend in a Slovakian slum to finish the task.
Yet even this is not the worst part. The writer is just adapting a story. No, the root cause is that the story just isn't very good.
I think that covers it. I could continue, but to do so would validate the film more than it deserves. Like I said, don't waste your money. This review is more entertaining.
Don't waste your money.