Not completely awful, just kinda lame

Rating: 4/10 (3 January 2016)

After hilarity Jupiter Ascending was, we get these few weeks later. This movie isn't as horrible as Jupiter Ascending, but it's far from being good. But still, what would you expect from an even more hilarious book?
I'll admit, the trailers were pretty good with a cool soundtrack and it actually looked promising and exciting in some parts, but no. There are 5 or 6, I can't remember, really short sex scenes with really toned down nudity and no one will be satisfied with them. For guys, Dakota Johnson just isn't attractive enough and for girls, they won't see Jamie Dornan's junk and end up being disappointing. I'm aware that this isn't a porno and wasn't supposed to be, but it could be a little more juicy because that's kinda the reason everyone went to see this movie and regretted it. The plot is very faithful to the book and considering that nothing really interesting happens in the first book aside from all that sex, this movie will probably be boring to you. But, like Jupiter Ascending, you can watch it with your friends and laugh at it. The cringe-worthy acting and writing are so bad it's hilarious. Okay, the actors weren't THAT horrible. They did what they could, but the script was awful and that's the main problem. The blame for that is probably on E.L. James because she was given too much freedom on set and you could even say it was written and directed by her.
Sam Taylor Johnson did a decent job as far as she could and the movie is actually very well shot and the soundtrack and score fit the movie very well. But, Danny Elfman, what are you doing here? You deserve so much movies that are better than this. They must have promised him a lot of money. But at least he gave the movie one more positive side.
I'm not calling this movie a complete garbage, it does have very few good sides, but it's still fun when you watch it with your friends and laugh your a*s off, but it's just lame. Maybe the sequel will be better and less embarrassing because more stuff happens and everything, but we will see.