anti-climactic flamer

Rating: 6/10 (10 July 2005)

The Fantastic Four
I will start this off by saying that I have never read a single Fantastic Four comic book. In fact, the only comic books I've ever read (Marvel, anyway - Barbie comic books don't count) are Superman and Wonder Woman. So I didn't go into this movie ready to tear it apart for not following the comic like I do with the Harry Potter franchise. Why did I see this movie? Well, I had a free ticket and there wasn't anything else that came out this week. Plus, I like Jessica Alba and Julian McMahon (from Nip/Tuck). However, Jessica Alba's character in this movie reminded me a little of Halle Berry in the X-Men films: she's pretty but she gets all the horrible lines. Too bad for her, because nobody will ever know if she's a good actress. But the script was funny - a lot more funny than I expected, and I actually enjoyed myself while watching this movie. I really liked Chris Evans (The Human Torch), but I have one comment - I know he says "flame on" when he activates his power, but I SWEAR he said "FLAMER!!" the first time. No one I have asked has agreed with me, but I don't care. The action was good, especially the first scene where they demonstrate their powers. Actually, that was the only really good action scene, thus making the film rather anti-climactic. When they finally "defeat" (and I use that term lightly) Dr. Doom, they heat him up and cool his body rapidly so he freezes. Now, if it were me, I'd make sure he'd never come back and would saw his head off or something. When I mentioned this to my movie-going companion, he was shocked because Dr. Doom is apparently "the best comic book villain ever" and they would never kill him off that easily. Of course they wouldn't - they're probably going to make a sequel... Sigh... But then again, no one in comic books dies the way they ought to. But honestly, there isn't much I can really say about this movie - it was one of the better comic movies I've seen in awhile, and it (thankfully) wasn't boring and the love story wasn't long and drawn out like the one in Spiderman or Daredevil. It was good, even though Michael Chiklis' wife was an absolute BITCH for no reason, Jessica Alba was pretty but not much else, Mr. Fantastic was more creepy than cool, The Thing was funny but smaller than I expected, and the whole movie was anti-climactic. What I liked? Johnny Storm and Dr. Doom - granted, they're good looking, but that wasn't the only reason, I promise. Good script though, even though I would have liked to see some bigger stars in it - Come on, how funny would Samuel L. Jackson have been as Dr. Doom? Matt Damon as Mr. Fantastic? Julia Roberts as The Invisible Woman? Johnny Depp as The Human Torch? The Rock as The Thing? Tell me that wouldn't have been awesome.
Rating: B-