Painfully dumb and cliché

Rating: 1/10 (30 June 2007)

When Kevin Smith spoofed scream in Jay and silent Bob strike back he was right to add the line "You guys are not even trying anymore" which is probably the case in this movie. It's just another superhero flick filled with overly familiar clichés that are effortlessly avoidable. It's all here, the couple doubting about whether they should bring up kids in this "superhero world" and eventually decide(Storm and Richards that is) to leave everything behind and naturally somebody overhears them and we get the "they don't care" kind of atmosphere while the movie subconsciously prepares us for the ending scene where they have a change of heart not because that's the right thing to do but because this is a childish superhero movie and kids must not be disappointed (in other words the happier the ending the more money the studio is going to make)
I had every intention of liking it but it's simply too lame a film to be liked. Since it starts with a wedding that gets interrupted it just has to end with the wedding's completion which makes the film even more predictable. The silver surfer on the other hand (well designed I'll give you that) protects Miss Alba because she reminds him of someone he used to love. How sad, I was reaching for the tissues when I heard that, the typical love interest that, for some incomprehensible reason every action flick has to have. Again this is the result of a lack of creative effort.
The ending is no better either. A stake is thrown at Richards and Storm, in a very altruistic manner (strange that only action movie characters are that altruistic) stands in front of him and gets stabbed herself, oh come on this is such a tear jerker since we all know she won't die (No Alba is too damn hot to get killed on screen). Her powers even prevent her from bleeding (not really, but realism has been given up in favor of a younger audience). The surfer heals her and utters the film's incredibly stupid punchline "You always have a choice" no s**t. Pretty much like what Paris Hilton said to Larry King "There are more important things in life than partying" again no s**t.
So Storm is fine and the team of 4 are back together and agree that they can't run away from their responsibilities. Remember the first Spiderman and how brilliantly it made this point? "With great power comes great responsibility", well this version of it is lamely written and terribly acted, just because you are a hottie Miss Alba it doesn't mean that you can get away with bad acting, go get some lessons.
And we now arrive at what I personally find the single stupidest sequence to ever appear in a major production. The wedding is taking place and the team receives a message about Venice...sinking into the Adriatic, that's a biggie remarks the thing. I got a good one how about earth about to crash into the f*****g moon? It's both stupid and biggie. Really what will they think of next? I know this is a comic book flick but that doesn't mean that we have to turn our brain off when we watch it.
Anyway they get on their super car which will take them to their nonsensical biggie and are greeted off with cheers. Goodbye fantastic 4, good riddance!
To sum up, this movie is extremely predictable, badly acted, clumsily written and cliché.