Too Casual...Too Bad

Rating: Null/10 (19 June 2007)

Only two years after the disastrous "Fantastic Four", Tim Story gives us the follow up story about the collection of friends who became a crime fighting force. The original was released in the wake of such great comic cinema such as "Batman Begins" and "Sin City", where the directors handled the material with a sincere tone and delicate, old-fashioned story telling techniques. "Fantastic Four" did not. Tim Story pieced together a rather pedestrian effort of a beloved comic. I considered it the worst film of 2005.
This film has a distinct advantage of having The Silver Surfer, a very recognizable, but seldom known character, who could have brought a menacing feel much needed in the first one. The result is something not nearly as bad as the original, but still lacking in terms of effective entertainment.
The movie begins with the Four, and The wedding of Sue and Reed. The wedding has been constantly postponed, and Sue desperately wants to have a normal life away from the constant media attention they receive. (I do like the audacity of a character who calls E! entertainment TV "garbage". Biting the hand that fees indeed). Something that didn't work in the original and it still doesn't work here, the group is generally bored with their powers and feels they are much more a curse than a blessing. Unlike The Hulk who has no control over his powers, and is genuinely cursed by them, the Fantastic Four can turn invisible at will, and stretch any body part to their desired lengths. It's a mystery why they do not embrace their abilities, and feel limited by them.
Reed and Sue (Played by the very wooden Ioan Gruffudd and Jessica Alba) are constantly sulking or complaining about the postponement of their wedding day (gee, you wonder if it will be postponed again) and are the straight characters of the bunch. Johnny (Chris Evans) is then the comedic character of the four, but never really offers any comedic moments that are too memorable. A groaning Michael Chiklis mails in another performance as The Thing, and proves that under four inches of foam rock, you may have a hard time creating a complete character.
The film's opening groans with sitcom-esquire moments of domestic problems involving superheroes that is done horrible wrong. It can be done right though, (See Brad Bird's "The Incredibles"). In another dastardly cliché moment, the straight laced husband to be, reluctantly attends his bachelor party thrown by his brother in law. He warns "No exotic dancers!". You can see where that is going a mile away. Do you think his fiancée will enter the party as he boogies down with a few hotties? I don't want to ruin anything.
All the while The Silver Surfer terrorizes the world, digging huge craters and freezing places that shouldn't be frozen. Actually his freezing ability never goes past the first five minutes, and you begin to wonder why it wasn't used more. He plans on destroying the world in only a manner of days, and he can not be stopped. The government asks for The Fantastic Four's help, and in my opinion, we have a pretty neat set up.
The problem with this material is that it is handled in the same way that the first film handled its material. It's far too casual in tone. The Surfer is also downplayed significantly. His true abilities are never fully explained, and if they had been, it would add tension and a complete menace to the character. Instead he hurriedly explains his motives, and at a rather odd time in the story. Johnny also seems far more concerned with a potential breakup in the group, or why a military babe doesn't express interest in him. He and The Thing hang out in a bar, shoot some darts, and slightly wonder what the end of the world will be like. I'd be a little more freaked.
With a little more dread, tightening of the tone, and giving the chance for the "Villain" to breathe, this could have been an explosive battle to save the planet, but instead comes off as if they aren't too concerned with the world's end. The appearance of Vick Von Doom adds nothing and is really not very interesting to watch. The finale is exciting in points, when you are not too distracted by their amazing ability to span the globe in seconds. There is also the potential death of a character late in the film. This has been done dozens of times, and excites no real emotions. Will the Four stay together? Will they learn to act like a team for the sake of the World? Will Sue and Reed ever get married? If you have seen any other lazily written film, you will know the answers.
It's not a terrible film, and has improved vastly over the first. This is mainly due to the basic plot outlined in the comics. The cast doesn't seem to be pushing it either. Alba (who looks nothing like Jessica Alba by the way) is one horribly untalented actress and Gruffudd is one of the least charismatic leading men in the movies. The production dates show that these were made quickly, maybe some more time and development could have helped. The filmmakers are mainly to blame though. They were given a good story on a silver plate (hehe) yet produced what we have here. It proves that better ingredients can not elevate the abilities of a crummy cook.