Conned Into Seeing it By Some Positive Reviews

Rating: 1/10 (18 June 2007)

I should have trusted my gut instinct, my common sense, and realised that this would have been the hugest pile of un-engaging crudular tripe ever made.
But no, I read a couple of reviews in the Free Papers (should have clicked here) saying that it was 95 minutes of fun. Well I had no fun, just sat there squirming with manic depression! It is the worst avalanche of excretion to be released in centuries. There's not even any point in saying about anything in the film, it was so useless.
Those people who wrote those 4 (out of five) star reviews should be banished to the sort of worlds that the Silver Spunker comes from.
Don't go and see this nonsense, Jessica Elba is tasty, but so are all the girls on the cover of the 90 men's mags at your local paper shop. She's just "some bird!"