Burn this movie and all of Chris Evans clothes

Rating: 1/10 (18 October 2007)

Ugh. Movie is superdumb. Jokes are corny. The chance to make the surfer interesting was in his face; which instead they decided would remain generic and art deco. If you're looking at his ass or his head, there's no difference. Larry Fishburne's voice sounds improbable coming out of the surfers mouth. What the hell happened to Alba? She's had surgery, she's got blue contacts, she's got false eyelashes, she's inflated her lips, she's lip-lined them. She's got blue eyelashes. She's half smurf, half ho-bag! Julian MacMahon's eyebrows should have their own credit. They're ridiculous. Chris Evans should be held down and licked, as soon as possible. And there should be a law written that doesn't allow him to wear clothes, and he should have to be at my place everyday at 5pm to give me a massage. ...etc.