This movie is so 1990's it hurts

Rating: 10/10 (20 November 2012)

What's so brilliant about this film is that John Woo made it.
No, not because he's Asian and good for him!
No, because he IS Asian. Really, besides watching American movies what does he know about American culture? It's John Woo's interpretation of American Culture and that's what makes this movie so special. Is it over the top? You're bet your ass it is. Why? Because it's a parody of American culture. John Woo watched Die Hard and said to himself, "Wow, Americans are crazy ass mother *******".
Did we fool the world into thinking we're all super hero Rambo 'Roid crazed guerrilla fighters from hell? You bet your ass we did, World, and John Woo's on board for the ride.
This movie is so 1990's that it makes any other attempt to define the 90's a complete and utter sham. It's big business, bigger action, and slow motion fight scenes coming straight from out of Woo's Ying Yang.
This review is an attempt to capture the audacity and preposterous nature of every minute of this movie. Hell, prison is even replaced with a futuristic "space prison" where inmates are wearing magnetic boots and there's an Orwellion big screen TV projection of calming nature documentaries meant to soothe the inmates but enrages them more than this run on sentence enraged you. Yeah I used a run on sentence. Why? Because everyone before the 20th century frigging used them, that's why. Screw you and your convictions, this movie and this review are so in your face you better wear a seat-belt while you experience it or you're going to fall straight out of your chair.
The End