Why would anyone want to wear the face of a bad actor like Nick Cage?

Rating: 4/10 (24 April 2003)

Oh Boy! This one is about 3 months past ripe! You need a gas mask or an on hand ambulance to make it all the way through this one. John Travolta goes from Pulp Fiction to this, how dumb. Nicholas Cage, everybody's favorite rusty robot, plays another bad role. Well, maybe it's the role that plays a bad actor. Either way, as expected this film sucked like a giant Hoover vacuum hose in a tornado. Nicholas Cage as expected, chewed on his tongue and babbled a lot of lunacy, while casting expressions that made me want to jump into the screen to check for his pulse. The question remains, Why do people love Nicholas Cage? If this were Shakespearean times Nicholas Cage would be lucky to get a job playing the witch's cauldron in Macbeth. The guy casts an aura that has only been rivaled by gravel and asphalt. Satan if you are out there, enquiring minds want to know how many films you gave Cage for his soul? When will we be rid of the violent, putrid stench that is Nicholas Cage? Most importantly, is hell an eternity of Nicholas Cage films? If so, maybe that is all preachers need to focus on to scare the Jesus into people.