Eye Candy that strives for artsy but comes up empty

Rating: Null/10 (20 March 2001)

Yes, it is of course uneventful, but thats not the problem...uneventful is okay, as long as it is thought-provoking and entertaining - but this film was laughable. We get to take a trip inside the mind of a rich yuppie doctor as he questions love, fedelity, and sexuality - it doesn't help that he is played by Tom Cruise. Plus, we also get to witness Stanley Kubrick at his most boring and self-indulgent, as if he is trying hard to be as artsy as possible but instead just comes off as *trying* to be artsy. Instead, it's just boring and contrived.
It's slow, yes, but so were "2001" and "Dr. Strangelove" - but they were decent films with rich subject matter. This was boring, empty effort. Also, it is one of his only films that takes place in regular, everyday society in modern times - a problem for Kubrick, who had been a recluse for many, many years prior and his more recent films (aside from "Full Metal Jacket", which he wrote from research) have usually delt with alternate or futuristic worlds. Maybe it wouldn't have hurt had he gone into the city and gotten a cup of coffee before penning a script like this. Maybe it would have come off as a bit more believable where the result is more...i don't know...laughable.
It looks and feels like a Kubrick film, but it hardly leaves the impression of a good one.