Like its two stars, beautiful and shallow

Rating: Null/10 (10 March 2000)

A beautifully detailed production but as shallow as a pizza pan. It can be helpful with a movie by a Kubrick to imagine that it was directed by someone else -- say, James Cameron -- and then ask yourself what your opinion of it would be. Eyes Wide Shut flunks the Cameron test dismally. Even the sumptuous visuals got on my nerves after a while. I mean, how many curtains of Christmas lights do I have to be shown before I shout, "I get the idea!"? And how many times does Nicole Kidman have to dissolve in naughty-schoolgirl giggles before you want to put duct tape over her mouth? The plot is entirely predictable, the married couple's wrangling is banal. A sad expensive failure.