A Travesty of Unforgivable Proportions

Rating: 8/10 (5 April 2013)

When I first heard that a remake of the "Evil Dead" was being made, I reacted in the way I always react about horror remakes. I hates the idea and cursed the idiots in Hollywood who would die if they had an original thought.
I started to come around to the idea after a while, however. I assumed, wrongly, that with Sam Raimi, Robert Tapert and Bruce Campbell as producers that maybe it would be unlike the other horrid remakes out there. Then came the commercial with the girl in the cellar sing songing that little creepy rhyme.
I liked the rhyme because that is what horror is. Horror is not monsters making you jump or excess blood all over the place. True horror is subtlety. True horror takes something that by all means should not be scary and makes it scary. True horror lies in the rhymes and the stories we tell each other as kids.
So when the credits ran and this scene did not even appear in the movie, I was ready to explode. This movie was not clever. It was not scary. It was not creepy. It was nothing but excessive gore for gore's sake.
"Evil Dead" and "Evil Dead 2" are two of the truly most brilliant and scary movies ever made. To this day I am still will not go into a fruit cellar after seeing Henrietta burst out of the fruit cellar floor. But what these original movies had were low budget film makers who made excellent films out of love and desire of the material.
You cannot take a movie that takes place in a cabin in the middle of nowhere, add huge production values and blood and expect it to come anywhere near the "Evil Dead." The existence of this dreadful piece of garbage is sad and they need to bury it for good.