Fan of originals, can't stand this one.

Rating: 2/10 (10 April 2013)

I am a fan of Evil Dead, Evil Dead II and Army of Darkness. I get them. Ash is a riot and a character with a lot of charm and theatrical winks to the camera. I'm writing this review because I can't stand thinking about other fans of the series of the movies that will be duped just like I was by the overall high score of the new Evil Dead movie and some of the glowing reviews.
I feel like I should rate the movie a 1 instead of the 2 I gave it just to help balance out the people who are giving it a 10/10, etc. However, I didn't do that and instead gave it my honest ranking which is a 2 out of 10.
This movie misses the point on several levels. Let me begin by stating that my impression is that the choice made in creating this movie was to try and ramp up the horror/gore while leaving out almost all of the dark comedy. However, the director has no idea how to make a horror movie or how to add tension. We sat in theater about to fall asleep because nothing was remotely believable, engaging or tense. Honestly, I'm not sure how you can have a film about a cabin in the woods and possession and stuff and not have some degree of tension innately present, but somehow this director pulled it off. There is gore and it caused some squeamish reactions in the audience, but the ONLY time I saw anyone actually jump was during a moment that was not actually scary, but rather a character moved quickly unexpectedly. I don't want to state more than that because I'm not out to ruin the movie for anyone who may be able to get a cheap thrill from it.
You will not come away from having watched this movie with any favorable impressions about the actors. Mia strangely conjures the hollow actress of the Twilight movies to mind both in looks and acting capability many times during the movie. The other characters are extremely unmemorable. You'll not care when nasty things happen or as they do nasty things to others.
I'm fine with Evil Dead being its own new thing, if it was a good movie in the process. This isn't. It feels like the director thought that buckets of gore and ripping things could make up for developing any tension, scrapping the comedy, having hollow characters with wooden actors and trying to spell everything out painfully to the audience. Even the good old evil book now has nice red scribblings in giant letters because it appears the director assumed the audience would be too stupid to figure out the book was bad news without it being written on it that it was in big red letters.
This film might have worked going with the more horror and gore and stripping away the comedy of the originals. I can see that as a potentially successful path for a director to take, but you have to deliver on the horror, tension and dread for that path to succeed. That didn't happen in this movie.
This film is stupid, it treats its audience like they are stupid too. This movie fails to scare, it fails to entertain, it fails to surprise, it fails to move anything forward, and I regret paying money to have seen it. It does a lot of the special effects better (which certainly wasn't hard to do) and has some more gross-out moments, but I don't think anyone going to see this film would have agreed to trade out the comedy of the originals for more minutes of mindless gore.
If you're the type of person who realizes gore does not equal horror, skip this one. If you know who Ash is and know what a "boomstick" is, skip this one. If you're young and easily scared, maybe watch it. If you're a fan of mindless gore, maybe watch it.
Fans of the original, be sure to watch after the credits. However, don't expect this small treat to do anything to make up for the movie you just sat through.