1 out of 10??? Really?

Rating: 8/10 (6 April 2013)

Since all of these "1 out of 10" reviewers decided that "not getting SCARED by a HORROR movie" warranted abysmal reviews, I figured I'd go to Wikipedia to find the definition of the genre.
"Horror is a film genre seeking to elicit a negative emotional reaction from viewers by playing on the audience's primal fears. Horror films often feature scenes that startle the viewer; the macabre and the supernatural are frequent themes. Thus they may overlap with the fantasy, supernatural, and thriller genres." http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Horror_film
So instead of whining about spending your hard earned money to go see a "non-scary" horror movie, maybe go into it a little more educated. I was extremely excited to see the Evil Dead universe get a small reboot, and even more excited to hear that Bruce Campbell had more of a behind the scenes role in the whole thing. I loved The Evil Dead and Army of Darkness, but to think that a complete "copy and paste" version of the original with today's obviously fickle viewing audience is complete insanity. The original was great because of it's use of practical, not CG effects; and because of it's balance between goofy and shocking. It was great for it's time, but certainly not for now. Ask yourself this: if they had taken a whole new cast, just put them in the script and overall execution of the original, and called it "Evil Dead"...wouldn't you be MORE upset? At least they changed it up a little.
I told myself I would keep this relatively short, so I'll say this of the reboot. Was I scared? No. Did I need to be? Not at all. Being among all these CLEARLY professional (lmao) horror movie critics, I can't help but think of how jaded they must be after 20...30...40 years of all the genre has to offer. All of us were freaked out by Jason, Freddy, Pinhead, Chucky, Leatherface, Damian, Reagan, etc...when they got around to doing what they do best. So after seeing all the different ways a person can get f***ed up, what's gonna sell? What will people want to see? *spoiler* Maybe a chick splitting her tongue in half with a utility knife. Or how about that same "chick" getting raped by a tree? (I can't help but laugh as I read that) If you were on YouTube looking at videos, and saw one entitled "guy with chainsaw arm" and one entitled "tongue splitting tree rape", I'm betting your curiosity takes you straight to the latter...just to see what it's about.
As I wrap up, the moral is: Try to appreciate what these movies do WELL, and don't dwell so much on where it falls a little flat. If you DO want to enjoy your horror movie experiences, go into it actually TRYING to enjoy it. Because I could think of very few movies that deserve anything close to a 1/10. Here's hoping I helped someone enjoy the movie. Tip: Don't expect too little, don't expect too much. Just take it for what it is.