Spotless is Errorless!

Rating: 9/10 (4 January 2005)

I am eternally grateful that I am in the conscientious state of mind to review the phenomenon of an avant-guarde film that is "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind". Not even the memory erasers of Lacuna can wipe my retrospection of this grand pelicula. Wait a second! What is happening? the Lacuna memory-wipers have snatched me! There has been a misunderstanding! I said i did not want this procedure done to me, Lacuna! Do not do this! What I meant is that people who are trepidated by "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind" are being babies and they belong in "la cuna"! Help meeeeee!
Joel (Meeza) Memory Erasing Phase #1: This innovative flick stars Jim Carrey as (man, what was his name in the movie? I think it had something to do with me!) Oh yes! His name is Joel! Man, that is my name! Joel is timid & sequestered (not me!), he drives a gray Toyota (me!), and wants to erase the memory of his last romantic relationship from his mind (always me! except the sex scenes! might need those for future self-help exercises!)
Joel (Meeza) Memory Erasing Phase #2: That Titanic actress with those titillating tits co-stars as Clementine. Oh my darling, Clementime! What is her name? I can't "win" since I am "let"ting the Lacuna technicians erase my memory. That is it! "Win" "Let"! Kate Winslet!!!!!!!! Yes! Clementine is the impulsive eccentric who first opts for the Lacuna procedure in order to erase her memory of her romance with Joel (which most of the girls I have gone out with have also opted to do).
Joel (Meeza) Memory Erasing Phase #3: Living screen writing genius Charlie Chaplin has written another clever script that clearly is unforgettable! Wait! His name is not Charlie Chaplin! It's Charlie something! (I start to cough repeatedly). "Man", I must stop "cough"ing! That is it! "Cough" "Man" Kauffman!!!!!! His name is Charlie Kaufman! Yes!!!!! Eat your heart out Lacuna!
End of Memory Erasing!
OK, I had my fun! I think I should stop these memory erasing puns before all of you erase this review very soon! To sum it all up, Carrey and Winslet's performances were exceptional and will be embedded in your cerebral cortex for days! That is no case of brain damage! Not to far off are the remarkable supporting acting contributions of Kirsten Dunst, Mark Ruffalo, Tom Wilkinson, and Elijah Wood. They all play the Lacuna technicians who are in no doubt Lacuna Lunatics. Jon Brion's musical film score scores high points as the best film score of the year! Last but not least, we cannot forget the directorial brainyman of "Eternal Sunshine". That would be French Director Michel Gondry! He had a "Gondre" task to achieve in directing a Kauffman script and he was able to do it masterfully! "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind" take on: fervency, anamnesis, subsistence, loneliness, and exigency cleaned house with originality to make this film spotless in cinematic magnanimity.
***** Excellent