Beach Blanket Bingo meets Henry the Serial Killer

Rating: 6/10 (18 March 2008)

****SPOILERS**** Funny in an unusual sort of way "Disturbia" despite it's last fifteen bloodcurdling minutes doesn't really have anyone in it's cast killed on screen. Yes the serial killer in the film had racked up over a score of victims all across the country but for some strange reason try as he could he couldn't as much as even draw blood much less kill, with the exception of an unfortunate policeman, the persons that he's really after in the film.
The only person killed, besides the cop as his killer, on screen in the movie is its star young Kale's, Shia LaBeouf, dad Mr. Brecht, Matt Craven, in a spectacular car crash early in the film. Kale is very sensitive as well as guilty, he was in the car with his dad when the accident happened, over his fathers death. It's a year later that Kale gets a bit disturbed when his Spanish teacher Senor Gutierrez, Rene Rivera, told the disruptive student what his father would think of his actions if her were alive today. Kale not having an answer to Gutierrez's question lands a stiff right to his head, giving Gutierrez a king size shiner, and ends up with three months house arrest.
The movie goes on with Kale stuck at home, with an electronic ankle brace, and having nothing to do but spy on his neighbors with his binoculars and state-of-the-art electronic spying equipment. Doing the usual crazy antics that you would expect from a teenager, without a cause, like Kale he gets his fellow Spanish class student Korean/American Ronnie, Aaron Yoo, to help him out. Ronnie goes outside the 100 foot perimeter, set by the court for Kale, checking things, with a video/DVD camera, out for him in what's going on, with the cute and sexy chicks, in the neighborhood
Everything is just groovy for Kale and Ronnie who later get to become friendly with Kale's new next door neighbor Ashley, Sarah Roemer. It's Ashley who the two horny teenagers had been spying on for days as she undressed in her bedroom, with the sades up, and went for daily dips, wearing an microscopic bikini, in her parents swimming pool. It's when Kale notices his other new next door neighbor Mr. Turnner, David Morse, acting a bit funny with the fact that a local young woman was just kidnapped the day before that he decides to play detective.
***SPOILER ALERT***Throwing away all the good times he was having in spying on his neighbors, mostly scantly clad and shapely teenage girls, up until then Kale begins to stalk, together with Ronnie and Ashley, poor Mr. Turner day and night making his up until them serene and quite life a living hell. Kale is out to see if Mr.Turner is in fact someone you wouldn't want to leave alone with the kids wife or even family pet. Mr. Turner, wanting very much to be a good neighbor, for his part tries to be as friendly as he can be with the suspicious Kale and friends. The mild mannered and soft-spoken Mr. Turner goes so far as helping Kale's mom Mrs. Julie Brecht, Carrie-Ann Moss, with her groceries and even fixes her cars flat tire.
Almost getting himself arrested by the police for breaking into Mr. Turners house Kale, whom the kind and understanding Mr. Turner refused to press charges against, is warned by the police and his guidance counselor that the next time he screws up they'll put him away in the lock-up, with hardened criminals, for a year. Still refusing to give up on his almost around the clock persecution of the very, who's nerves by now has reached their breaking point, kind and understanding Mr. Turner Kale gets exactly what he wants but not how he thought he would get it; A face to face confrontation with a psycho serial murderer. Kale by crying wolf for so long in accusing the lovable and Teddy Bear-like Mr. Turner of being a serial killer has no one believe, as if they did before, him now when a real live and blood-thirsty serial killer came on the scene.
You never get the feeling that "Disturbia" is what it tries so hard to be in its scaring the hell out of you. Everything about it, in trying to be a horror film, is so out of focus that it comes across as a Three Stooges comedy short with almost nobody, despite all the suffering their put through, really getting hurt. The teenagers, Kale & friend, act like those playful and party going youths and teenagers in 1960's Frankie Avalon & Annette Funicello beach party movies. They don't for a moment give you the impression that their being stalked and attacked, with the intent of being murdered, by a serial psycho killer at all!
P.S In fact Kale's ordeal in being involved with a serial psycho killer, whom in the end he does in, doesn't at all impressed the police or even his schools probation officer! He still, after all his heroic efforts in the film, has to serve out his three months house arrest despite of all he did in preventing further murders in and around town!