Just Die

Rating: Null/10 (29 July 2002)

Spoilers herein.
This genre is now mature enough to have several requirements in addition to simple orange explosion balls. You must have a brilliant adversary. That adversary must lead you through at least one major surprise. Since the franchise was getting old, we have _two_ major surprises here: the switch between revenge maps and simple theft and the switch between destroying the gold as an act of Islamic terrorism and again simple theft.
Along the way must be many crises. At the end, some personal growth must result. Click, click, click. Thrills by numbers.
The only interesting thing to do here is to watch the actors as actors and wonder why they are there. Willis is there because he has mastered the art of simultaneously acting a role and commenting on it in a secret dialog with the viewer. Jackson is there in the Danny Glover role because Glover wouldn't be right and because he looks like Malcolm Small. Jeremy Irons exists in this world like Willem Dafoe: a serious actor who cannot find meaty parts so fills in where studio bosses want.
But Sam Phillips is a weird one. Here is the superchristian popular preacher, playing the evil slut with a death fetish. She is a mercenary for Islam, intent on the double-cross following only her lust. This is strange. Very strange.
Ted's Evaluation -- 1 of 4: You can find something better to do with this part of your life.