Ryan Reynolds and the quest for hotness

Rating: 4/10 (13 March 2016)

Ryan Reynolds is despicable. And while it's quite possible that I hate him out of jealousy, glancing over his filmography (which is primarily composed of egregious nonsense) I can say with a certain degree of confidence that that is likely not the case. Reynolds has never had the opportunity to endear himself to his audience, being consistently the star in projects that cast him in the worst possible light: a straight-up, no holds barred, unapologetic douchebag.
That being said, the character of Deadpool is widely known for his zany vulgarity, so perhaps Reynolds was in fact the right choice. A famed douchebag to play a fictional famed douchebag? Sounds right to me.
But once again, Reynolds' capacity to entertain is destroyed by a real yawner of a script, that pretends to elevate itself above (or even below) its comic-book predecessors with fourth-wall breaks, awful jokes, and graphic violence. While all this could have been effective in creating a delightfully subversive comic-book film that poked fun at literally everything with gleeful abandon, it eventually devolves into a blatantly self-congratulatory splatterfest that assumes that it has achieved its goal of challenging modern film without doing so itself.
Despite Deadpool's unique take on the superhero genre, it all revolves around a formulaic, ridiculous plot populated with unlikeable characters. Ryan Reynolds stars as ex-special forces something-or-other named Wade Wilson, who goes around being a jerk to stalkers. He then finds a woman at a bar, who is equally despicable, and they have great sex for a very, very long time. Then he gets cancer.
Jesus Christ. Ex-special forces? The Punisher? No wait. He goes around being a jerk to stalkers. Sounds sorta like...Kick Ass! Wait, now he has cancer?! I'm not sure if Eddie Brock had cancer in the comics, but I think he did. And the sex? Well, that's basically every superhero, isn't it? Sigh. The formula is all too evident. Everything we see in this film, apart from the jokes, we've seen before in other films and comic books. And then, when it couldn't get any worse, it does.
His cancer is cured by a not-so-nice guy named Francis, who subjects him to a lot of pain in a slew of equally cringe-worthy scenes that emphasize the writer and the director's lack of regard for the human condition. Oh yes, and the story is narrated by Deadpool himself. Which really sucks, because narrated stories naturally suck.
Deadpool eventually gains his superpowers, which turn him into yet another invincible superhero. He says it himself. He can't die. I hate it when films do that, making (anti)heroes that can't die even after being completely wasted, as it suddenly removes any tension or risk factor that had hitherto existed.
Subsequently, Deadpool devolves even further into a mess of bullets, blood, and humourless jokes all in the vein of Ryan Reynolds' quest to regain his beauty. Yes, it's as empty and ridiculous as it sounds. It may have even been saved had the jokes been funny in any way. I mean, that was what I wanted from the film. I knew that the plot and characters would likely be a letdown, but heard that the hilarity factor of the film more than made up for it. But I simply didn't laugh. Not once. And I found this unusual. It's not as if I don't appreciate nasty jokes. I laughed until it hurt in Spy, Borat, and The Dictator. Hell, I even laugh at Mike Tyson Mysteries. But this film, despite its obvious intention to leave me laughing, left me completely impassive, if not outright disgusted.
This film includes some nice cameos, which I certainly didn't expect (having avoided the trailers out of anticipation), a few well-done action scenes which brim with glorious movement, a cool, popping' soundtrack that I couldn't help but look up, and a neat visual style. But despite this, it's still a very, very poor film that left me exceedingly disappointed.
I would recommend Deadpool only for its novelty, although whether such novelty is a step forward or backward is in your hands to determine.