The Ultimate Cure to Marvelophobia

Rating: 8/10 (27 April 2016)

I hate superhero movies. I used to liked them, until I outgrown them or, maybe, until they started to become a show of cheesy characters in some sort of idiotic pose trying to spout cool sentences as empty as their heads. A sign of what is also going outside the big screen. The new Spiderman, Thor, Batman vs Superman, The Avengers, Iron Man, X-Men Days of the Future Past (which ruined the memory of the first X-Men comic I ever read, by the way) and, in general, every single DC and Marvel production (particularly the latter, banging out films/series like there's no tomorrow) has been a nightmare for people who, like me, are adults with a brain fitting their age.
That's why I love this movie. I can't get enough of the dark humour, of the jokes about X-Men and the whole clichéd superhero franchise so loved these days. I wish there were more movies making fun of superheroes and their stupid and silly behaviour. It's great to be able to watch something which one of its main purposes seems to be to laugh at everything, particularly at established and forced social patterns; and itself. So many people seem to miss that this movie, the whole thing, is a joke. Stop talking about a better plot and character development. You just want another clichéd superhero movie. Special mention to those claiming this to be the worst Marvel/superhero movie. Please, go watch Captain America profound psychological struggles and Avengers' heartfelt sacrifices and leave the rest of us with some serious (right!) fun.
I'll end up this review by pointing you towards some funny and silly "contributions" I noticed before starting my review. Let us take our friend Joshhanks777, with his 1/10 rating, 16 April 2016. This guy seems to have been so bored with the movie that he felt asleep, because he enlightens us by letting us know that "The main character is very unlikeable [...] and the other characters are not memorable at all, particularly the bland villain and his girlfriend who is a stripper" Erm... Wait... What??? Was I, perchance, the one asleep? No, that couldn't be... But then... How can this individual, who comments on the movie like he watched it all, mistake the main character (who is supposed to be Deadpool) with the bland villain? Because I didn't see any other stripper girlfriend but Wade's, although she wasn't technically his girlfriend anymore... Or maybe he didn't realise what Deadpool looked like without the mask and thought that he stole the girlfriend from Wade the bland villain at the end???? Or, perhaps, he considered the plot of this simple movie so twisted and labyrinthine that he got lost in the deluge of deep, emotional characters with complicated relationships... It couldn't be that he doesn't have a clue about what he is talking about! That'd be impossible. Next, user mufcsince and his/her love for children's shows: "Barney the Dinosaur is more entertaining than this movie." There you have your mindset. And continues "if one wants to watch porn, they'd watch porn." You seem to be confused about the meaning of the word "porn". Check it out. Learning can be fun! Does Bernie not teach that? Moving along, you have to wonder what the francis a person is thinking when he/she writes a review that is, in fact, a summary of the plot, without even a single personal opinion (which is actually better, considering the shiny jewels people drop for opinions). Take the user GoodHandsomeLad, as an example. Review "Simply Excellent.", 13 February 2016. So much for brilliance, such genius and originality! Then we have muhammadwasim-40771 with his "Indecent movie" post entry (the title should say it all). I quote (untouched grammar): "Deadpool is a Marvel's super hero movie and is supposed to watch by more kids than adults [...]" This guy seems to be so sure of himself than he doesn't even care about reality! Superhero movie? Wake up! If kids watch R-rated movies, well, you are not doing a good job as a parent. "These kind of movies are destroying new generation morally and physically." Physically? Indirectly, or do kids hit themselves with new acquired Blu-Ray discs in a maelstrom of hilarity and decadent rapture of joy? Sure, they could not instead be destroyed by sending them to fight wars so the elite can have cheaper oil, or having to cope with irresponsible and alienating parenthood, or indoctrinating them with tales about some guy in the sky wanting to punish anyone who doesn't do as he commands. It must be, surely, this movie. Oh, and Marilyn Manson, of course. "[...] superhero movie should not be like this bcoz its a marvel character and kids don't understand why we r forbidding them to see the movie" Again with the superhero... Did you hear about the antihero archetype? Once more, you seem to be a lousy father, Muhammad. Perhaps you should have considered abstinence, particularly in light of human overpopulation and third world hunger.
Anyway, I finish here this, my homage to Deadpool and his disappearing lot. I hope you enjoyed it and didn't find it abusive in any way. After all, my only wish is for all of us to get along. Until our politicians order us to go kill each other in some remote land for a made-up reason.
Written by a Deadpool wannabe